Don't Threaten Me With A Good Time - Ryden

17

"Where is he?" I almost scream into the phone at Ryan's manager, Shane. The guy was an absolute asshole, anyone who knew him would agree with me in that, everyone except Ryan. He saw the best in a guy who had nothing to offer the world. That was a classic Ryan move.

"Why do you care, Urie? Shouldn't you be fucking your new bass player or something?" He laughs, acting as if my sexuality is anything to make fun of. God, he was such a prick.

"I want to talk to him." I groan, my eyes darting over the road in front of me as I pull onto the highway.

"Why don't you just ask him where he is? I don't keep tabs."

"You think I haven't already tried that!?" I spit. Did he think he was my first call? As if my first thought was to call the biggest asshole I know? The guy who threatened Pete's son? Yeah, no thanks. He was my last resort.

"He won't answer. Neither will Dan, or even Z.... Shane you're kind of my last resort."

"Nice to hear that Brendon Urie is now asking for my help." He says, voice full of cockiness that he didn't deserve to have. He was shit. Nothing he ever managed ended up working out. Every band he worked with was nothing. He even managed to send Ryan, a guy who was full of talent, down into a spiral of nothingness. Shane sucked, and to even have to ask him for help was the lowest point of my existence.

"Are you going to tell me or not?" I ask, rolling my eyes.

"He's at Z's house. I think Dan is there too. Could be the reason they're all ignoring y--" click. Yeah, I didn't need to hear anything else out of that assholes mouth.

***

Z lived in a small house right outside of echo park. It was about a thirty minute drive from my house to hers, luckily, I was already half way there.

My mind was racing with questions. What will I say when I get there? Will he even want to see me? Will z and dan even let him see me? How will he react when I tell him I'm leaving Sarah? Will he even want to be with me? How will I handle that rejection again?

I need to stop thinking so much.

My fingers dig into the cigarette box I have in the cup holder. I pull out a cigarette, place it between my lips and light that sucker up. It's not good for me, but I've found that smoking helps with my anxiety, and fuck, my anxiety is out of control right now.

Smoke falls from my mouth and flies through the cracked window next to me. The slow drags I take calm me down a bit, but not quite enough. I can feel my hands shaking against the steering wheel. I'm not ready for this, but I don't really have a choice.

***

By the time i reach Z bergs house, I'm in a full on panic. No pun intended. Ryan is mere feet away and I still don't know what to say to him. All I know is that I need to see him, and I can't wait any longer.

I pull myself out of the car and practically run to the front door, knocking softly on the maple wood. Within seconds I hear footsteps, the sound of the door unlocking, and then the sound of the door creaking open.

Z's eyes look me over and her face flushes as if she had seen a ghost. She practically has, seeing as the last time I saw her was in 2009, when she was acting as Ryan's gay beard. When everything happened I lost her as a friend, rightfully so. She moved on with Ryan and they both left me in the dust.

"He doesn't want to see you." She says quietly, probably trying to make it so Ryan couldn't hear her.

"I don't care. I need to see him." I reply, peeking around her shoulder into the large living room. There was a figure heading our way, but I couldn't quite see who was there. The pounding in my heart told me it was Ryan. "Ry...?" I ask, speaking over Z, who quickly steps over to block my view of the figure.

"You really should leave Brend--"

"Z... I've got it covered." I hear the voice behind her say. When she moves out of the way I'm met by puffy red eyes and matted brown hair. Ryan Ross looked practically broken. And I know it's my fault. It's always my fault.