Chapter 38

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Patrick knew I wasn’t talking to him. And I knew he wasn’t happy about that. But I was pissed as hell at him. It honestly felt like he’d crossed a line, a huge one--probably the biggest one--and I wasn’t just going to forget it so easily.

I wasn’t talking to Jaxon either, though. In fact, I wasn’t even giving either of them the time of day since we got to the house. I stormed out of the car and took off for my room, feeling just so utterly done with everyone and the entire day.

For the rest of the night, I never left my room. Patrick and Jaxon each tried to get me to unlock my door and come out once, but then left me alone after since I never even made a noise in response. Neither of my uncles tried to coerce me out, not even for dinner, so I assumed Patrick filled them in on something. Otherwise, I was sure one of them would have been hounding me to get out of my room like they usually did.

It was nearly eleven o’clock when I heard a knock on my door. I was just drifting off to sleep when the sound startled me. I was clearly sleep disoriented because I actually spoke to Patrick when he asked if I was awake. Of course, it was a snappy remark. I hadn’t forgotten to be mad at him in my sleepy state.

“Fuck off,” I said. “I’m trying to sleep and I don’t want to talk to you of all people.”

There was a silence that stretched through the darkness of my room and for a minute I thought that he had given up and walked away. But then Patrick spoke once more and I nearly wet the bed when I heard what he had to say.

“Rikert’s here,” he said in a hushed tone. My eyes went wide. How did he get in? Why would Patrick let him in the house? How the hell did they get passed my uncles? “Do you want to talk to him, Caise? I’m sorry I hit him, if that’s what you’re so mad about. We talked, and...patched things up, I guess. But I told him it’s up to you if you wanna see him.”

My normally mundane task of breathing suddenly became increasingly difficult as my cousin spoke to me from the other side of my door. He talked to Rikert? What the hell? I knew I had to talk to him now. If Rikert was in the house or standing there and I didn’t let him in my room to talk to me, all hell would break loose. And things were already so fucked up that I needed anything but that.

“I-I’ll talk to him,” I answered just as quietly.

I stumbled out of bed in the dark and unlocked my door when I got to it. Turning the doorknob, I pulled it open slightly, and saw Patrick standing there awkwardly with my boyfriend at his side. A knife twisted painfully in my chest as I let my eyes roam his face, anywhere but his eyes. I was starting to hate his eyes. The gorgeous green eyes had once been one of the few things I loved, but now whenever I looked at them, I only saw purely raw emotions; ones that made me want to either cry or die or hide.

“Hey,” Rikert said, offering me a smile.

I think my heart stopped. Either that, or my brain did. My voice broke off when I answered with an equally quiet, “Hey.”

I blinked and stepped back, letting Rikert pass me to get into my room. He found the lamp by my bed and turned it on, letting a little light surround the three of us. I went to shut my door when Patrick stopped me by putting his hand over mine firmly.

“Behave, please,” he whispered, staring intently, and somewhat pleadingly, into my eyes. “My dads would kill me if they found out I did this. And be careful. I don’t like hearing him yell at you, alright? Besides, it’s way too late for that.”

I nodded and looked down at his feet, too embarrassed to meet his eyes. He let go and I watched him walk back towards his own room. It felt like I was suffocating as soon as I shut my door and nervously faced the tall boy standing next to my bed. His looks still got to me in this dim lighting, and the regretful expression covering his face, sharing the surface with his bruises, made my heart melt.

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