ROBOT JESUS

Cut to the Chase

Susan was afraid this might happen.

All the money in the world meant nothing to her without that robot.

As she and Alice left the store together, she was surprised to feel grateful for Alice's gentle presence, cradling her arm as they walked across the sidewalk in front of the Sooper Dooper.

She wondered why it surprised her that Alice was being so nice. Susan would have thought that Alice would be feeling just as sad.

Alice was in front of Susan in line and Alice also had come away from the experience bruised and with nothing to show for it.

#

Inside the store, Justin and Aspen had scoured the makeup and sporting goods sections to no avail.

They met inside the front doors.

"What's next?" Aspen asked.

She was not very interested in going to prison, but she really didn't believe that they would be going to prison. This just happened to be the most interesting thing going on right now. And though she would never mention it to him, she was beginning to see how adorable Justin was, her eyes landing on his dimples and took note of his flushed cheeks.

"We have no way of knowing if he's even in the store," Justin said.

They both turned their heads to look out the front doors of the store.

The world looked so big out there. Their pursuit suddenly seemed hopeless and they both began to feel very small.

#

Susan was about to step off the curb into the parking lot when she heard the loud squeal of rubber on concrete.

She and Alice turned quickly to see Susan's late model Dodge Dart careening toward them.

Justin and Aspen also heard it. From behind Susan and Alice, they could be seen crowding against the glass to identify the noise.

The car was coming at Susan like a maniac.

The driver's sandaled feet worked the pedals in a random way.

The car careened like a bullet toward the two women, then screeched to a halt. Then, the car sped up again, moving fatally toward them, getting closer and closer. Alice reached around Susan and Susan grabbed Alice's bosom.

The car screeched violently to a halt in front of the two women, narrowly missing them.

They were now tangled together like a human pretzel.

Robot Jesus reached over, opened the passenger side door and said, "Get in if you want a robot."

Behind the glass doors, Justin and Aspen looked at one another and began talking excitedly and pointing at the car, words unheard behind the glass facade.

Susan and Alice stared at the robot, unraveling their contorted form.

The robot bowed its head and seemed to be thinking, then looked up and said, "Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good."

Alice looked at Susan. Susan looked at Alice and they both said together, "Romans 12:9."

That seemed to be good enough for the two woman as Alice climbed in the back and Susan got in the front of the car.

As soon as Susan had closed the car door, Robot Jesus slammed a sandal on the accelerator and off they went.

Justin and Aspen burst from the store, Justin yelling at the top of his lungs, "HEY! THAT'S OUR ROBOT! STOP! STOP!"

But it was too late. The robot had escaped.

Justin's feet slowed to a stop, his arms dangling, his mouth hanging open.

Aspen ran into the parking lot, taking a large set of keys out of her khakis and yelling back to Justin, "Tell Gus! I'll pick you up in front. We can't lose them!"

Justin quickly gathered her intent, nodded his head and ran back into the store.

Gus was locked on the cameras aimed out of the front of the store and had witnessed the entire escape from his cramped office. His mouth was also hanging open as he observed Justin re-entering the store.

He quickly grabbed a handheld video camera from one of the nearby shelves and ran out of the office to meet Justin.

As Justin struggled in vain to get through the mob at the robotics counter, some of whom included smiling customers, walking away with their brand new Jesus A.I. Units, Gus bowled through the crowd.

"Gus!" Justin said. He had never been happy to see Gus.

"I know, " Gus replied. "I saw what happened. Go! Go!"

Justin nodded and turned, sprinting to the front of the store.

Gus made for a side exit, where his driverless Chevrolet was parked in the "managers lot."

For the first time in his life, Gus felt like he was fulfilling his destiny, the role he had always dreamt of becoming: a famous film director.

As he lumbered through the gigantic store, he considered that his handheld digital recorder was capable of shooting 4K video, which was good enough to be projected on the big screen.

He saw his name in lights and had already begun assembling the film in his head, knowing he had captured all of the action needed for act one.

His mind was racing as he burst through the side door, ignoring the sign that said: DO NOT OPEN. ALARM WILL SOUND.

No alarm sounded.

He got into the passenger seat of his car about the time Justin ran out the front doors of the Sooper Dooper.

He broke a smile when he saw Aspen's brand new Dodge Charger. He knew this model was fast.

A surge of emotion filled his belly. He was beginning to like this girl and he knew it.

Aspen smiled back at Justin and then hit the accelerator.

The engine roared.

The chase was on.