Chapter 14

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(And still Michel's POV)

When we got to my car Mark looked at me. „I'm not coming with you. I'm not."
„Mark please. Come. Let me explain you this. Please Mark. Please." Mark looked at me with his still red eyes. „Fine." He opened the door and sat in.
I got into the driver's seat.
As we drove, there was silence between us. The hurtful silence. I started to talk as we reached to an old lake house.
„Okay Mark. Let me explain first and then you can scream at me or kick me or slap me or whatever you want to do okay?" Mark nodded. „My dad is forcing me to marry this girl Eliza-Jane. I don't love her or like her as a girlfriend. She is more just a friend. I want to say no to dad but I'm a coward. I'm scared that he will kill me if I say no but mostly I'm scared that he will do something to you. My brother told me that I have to say no to dad but I can't. But I can't lose you neither." I wiped the tears from my cheeks. Just the thought of losing him made my heart feel this unbearable pain.
„So now you can slap me or yell or beat me. Just do anything." I said as I looked back at Mark.
Mark took off his seatbelt and moved closer to me. I saw tears in his eyes.
Suddenly he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into a hug. He sobbed into my shoulder:„ If you have to do it, then do it. There's nothing we can do now. I love you and the thought of losing you is killing me. But I have to face the hurt."
I hugged him back but I tightened my grip around him. Now I understood what I had to do. „Mark. I know what we're going to do. We are still going to meet. I'm not leaving you. No never. This place. This lake will be our meeting place. We'll meet here and we'll spend some time together. Okay?"
Mark looked up to me. „No Michel. No. I want to be with you in public not in some forest. No. I guess our thing was just a..."
„Mistake? It was a mistake?" I asked Mark with angry voice.
„No, no,no. Don't even fucking dare to think that. We just can't be together. We can't." I saw the pain in his eyes. I grabbed his face with my hands and just kissed him.
The kiss was full of love. But it was also full of pain. I had to leave him. He had to leave me. I had to forget his eyes and his scent, my drug. He had to forget me because otherwise he would get hurt.
When we stopped kissing, I wrapped my hands around his waist and hugged him. I let go of him and started the car. Mark put his seatbelt on and just sat in silence.
In this moment it had hit me the hardest way possible. Tears fell from my eyes. I was sobbing. I wanted to scream, beat something. The pain, it was just stabbing my heart. I felt Mark's hand on my shoulder. „Michel I love you with all of my heart. I will never love someone in the same way like I love you."
„Same to you Mark."
I took Mark to his house and before he got out we shared one last kiss. It was the most painful one. „I love you." Mark whispered into the kiss. „I love you." I whispered back to him.
As soon as he closed the door, I slammed the gas pedal and just drove home, sobbing.
I stopped the car and got out. I closed the door and locked the car. Before I stepped inside I took a deep breath to calm down.
I opened the door and stepped in. I took off my boots and coat and ran into my room slamming the door behind me. I crawled into my bed and let the tears fall again. I curled up in a ball and covered myself with a blanket.
I heard a knock on my door. I stayed quiet and the door opened. My brother and my mom walked into my room. I was suprised that my mom came here but to be honest I didn't really care.
„Bro shh it's okay. I'm here." my brother sat next to me and put his hand on my shoulder. I slowly crawled up to him and just hugged him. My brother was always there for me. Always. He was there when dad beat me up. „I lost him. He is gone." I whispered to Marco's shoulder.
„What? Why? How?" Marco was in a shock. „He told me that if I have to marry Eliza then I have to. That we can't be together."
I felt someone else's hand on my back. It was my mom. „I'm sorry baby. And I'm sorry for over-reacting yesterday." I just nodded. Marco just held me.
„So I guess it's time to get the wedding things done. It's only 5 months away." I said still sobbing. „It can wait bro. Let the girls deal with it. Right now it's important for you to let out your pain. I'm not leaving your side. Cry on my shoulder as long as you want."
I heard my mom leaving. Suddenly I felt so tired. My eyes just closed itselves and I fell into deep pain free sleep.

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