sleeping beauty ♕ mnz • EDITING

ten

⠀mackenzie
⠀⠀⠀I heard a voice coming closer to my room, and I immediately recognized it as Maddie's. I wished I could greet her, tell her I loved her, but I couldn't. For the past two months I had wanted to apologize, but I couldn't. I couldn't do anything but lay here and cause people to be emotional.
⠀⠀⠀"Hey, Mackenzie." Maddie's voice was right by me now. "I wish you'd come back," she whispered.
⠀⠀⠀I wished I could too. I didn't want to cause this pain; it was my fault that we had crashed. I had brought up Dad. I had made Maddie look away from the road. It was my fault that Maddie was put in so much pain; not just her, but Levi and Mom, too.
⠀⠀⠀"I never meant for any of this to happen. Not just the crash, but any of it. For our fighting, my being such a jerk, shutting out dad. Heck, I bet we're the reason he left. This is all my fault; I got so mad about a few stupid words, which were probably true. Everyone thinks you're not coming back. They said you're a lost cause, and that I need to stop getting my hopes up because I'm just going to let myself down."
⠀⠀⠀Maddie was in tears by now; I could hear it in her voice.
⠀⠀⠀"But I know they're wrong. I know that if you really, really try, you can come back. If you do wake up, I'll try my hardest to be a better sister- I know I've been a pretty crappy one. I'll drive you to as many parties and trips to the mall as you want. I'll try to stop getting mad at you over everything. I'll try to let dad go. But if you can, please try to come back. I miss you. Mom misses you. We all miss you." Maddie could barely choke out the last few words through her tears. She grabbed my hand and squeezed. "I love you, Mackenzie. I can't do this without you."
⠀⠀⠀I couldn't take it anymore. Maddie was in so much pain. Mom and Levi were in so much pain. I never realized I meant this much to anyone.
⠀⠀⠀I loved Maddie more than anything; I wanted to apologize so bad it almost hurt. I just wanted to be able to sit up and hug her, telling her that everything was alright. I wanted to hold her hand back.
⠀⠀⠀I took all of my strength. I took all of the strength Maddie had given me, all of the strength my mom had given me, all of the strength Levi had given me. All of the strength the doctors and nurses had given me. All of the strength my dad had given me. I took it all, and I put it into my one hand. My right hand. The one Maddie was holding. I took all of the minimal strength and power I had left.
⠀⠀⠀And I squeezed back.