The 4 delinquents next door

Chapter 19

We are waiting for the disk to load, I looked at the guys ,and they looked at me then back at the laptop.

"I don't have a good felling about this" Justin said, the guys, and I nodded in agreement.

 The DVD started playing, Damien popped up in the screen, and  I was confused. 

"Stacey since your 18 soon, I wanted to give you a birthday present, I know you might like it, and I know for a fact that 1k people already do. Just put that link in the address bar, and click on the YouTube video now bye" Damien said.

I was confused, so were the guys but I put the link in the address bar, and the YouTube video popped up. 

"You don't have to do this" Justin tells me.

"I know but I want to know what he was talking about when he said 1k people have already liked it, and anyway it's probably a video of me singing when I was about 9" I tell him.

"Yeah, that's probably it" Ryan said.

I clicked on the YouTube video, it was on Jai's channel because it's his picture,and he's captioned the video "stupid slut". I looked at the guys, they were already looking at me then to the laptop.

"Guys. I don't know if I want to watch this" I say.

"It's fine, you don't have too" Ryan, Lee, and Justin tell me.

Steven clicked on the video, and it started playing.

"What the fuck Steven, she didn't want to watch it" Ryan told him.

"I do" Steven said, and Lee was going to pause it.

 "Stop, let's just watch it what's the worse that can happen" I say. 

Lee, and Justin gave me unsure looks but nodded. The video started with me on my bed, then the guy coming into my room, and raping me. Jai had edited it,  he had taking all the sound out, and put 'SoMo- ride' as the music.  I got up then ran into the bathroom, I closed the bathroom door, and cried I can't believe he did that what the actual fuck. I heard the guys shouting at Steven for playing the video, it isn't Steven's fault so they shouldn't be shouting at him, there was a knock on the bathroom door, and I had stopped crying over about 2 minutes ago. I just sat in the bathroom thinking why did Damien, and Jai  do this. I got up then unlocked the bathroom door to find Steven. 

"Sorry. Stace, I shouldn't have clicked on the video" Steven said. 

"Look it's fine Steven. I mean there was over 1k views on it anyway, I mean now everyone probably knows that I have a video on YouTube of me "having sex'" I tell him. 

"It wasn't really sex you were getting raped" Steven was saying, and I cut him off.

 "Steven I am fine, anyway I am going to the beach.  I will see you in a bit" I tell him. 

Steven looked at me, you could see the regret in his eyes but he shouldn't be felling regretful, and I hugged him.

"I am not mad at you Steven" I say, Steven nodded, and we went downstairs.

 "Guys. I am going to the beach. I want to be alone" I tell them, and the guys nodded.

"It's not Stevens fault, don't blame him please" I say, and the guys again nodded.

I walked to the beach with my earphones in, I am listen to' Sean Paul & Faydee- she doesn't mind (remix)', and I sat on the rocks like always.  I just thought for one second what it would be like if I slipped, fell into the water, and started drowning until I stopped breathing. I quickly shook that thought out of my head, and watched the waves while listen to 'nightcore- soldier'. The song got cut off with an incoming call, the caller ID is Justin but I was having an Inner debate to answer it or not, then  I went with not, and decided to go for a walk. If I am not answering his calls he will come to the beach but if I go for a walk he might not find me, and give up. I went for a walk, and got another call from Justin but I answered this time.

*Phone call*

Justin: "Stace where are you? Are you safe?"

Me: "I am safe, I am just walking around."

Justin: "Stace it's not safe walking by yourself in the dark, come home please."

Me: "Justin I..I...I...Okay. I am coming home."

Justin: "Okay, see ya soon."

Me: "Okay, yeah."

I hung up on him, I need to put a brave face on when I get in,and I don't want the guys worrying about me. It feels like when you start feeling better something always pulls you back to where you started, it's not the fact that I want to give up, and it just gets tiring after a while ya know.
I realized that I am talking to myself which is great since that's completely normal, I reached the house when I walked in Justin, and all the guys are up. I looked at the time it's 1:30 am, oh that's why Justin called, and I didn't realize it was that late. 

"Hey guys. I am going to bed, I will see you all in the morning" I tell them.

"You okay?" Justin asked me.

I put a fake smile on like a learned to do at a young age but you get use to it, and nodded at him.

"I am fine really" I say.

Justin gave me that I don't believe you look, I smiled then went upstairs to Justin's room, and I had my earphones in. I am listen to 'Ty Alexander - too many secrets' then sat with my earphones in up full blast, and I lay down on Justin's bed while I tried not to cry. You have to believe me I hate crying but the tears won't stop, and I couldn't get rid of this hurt/betrayal from my own fucking brother.