Tell Your Friends [Martin Garrix]

Chapter 11 | ✓

The days passed quickly, filled with excitement and minimal amount of stress and anxiety. I didn't get any notes since that night and nightmares didn't bother me much, since Martin was sleeping with me. It's like his presence is helping me fight my nightmares and horrors. Every night, he helps me fight my monsters. 

Time passes quickly and here I am, riding in a yellow taxi, Martin by my side, to the airport. No matter how hard I was trying to persuade myself that it was for the best, I was never able to persuade myself fully. It feels unfair, that Martin is going to leave me, maybe forever. Who knows, what might happen when we separate? 

I will miss him, but I will get used to it. It all will resolve, it's just a matter of time.

The taxi ride seems quicker than lightning. It seems that the ride to the airport was shortened by some kind of magic. Magic of not wanting something to happen. Never wanting something to happen, to change your life completely, most probably in bad way. 

It's silent in the cab, Martin and I never dropping a single word, probably just to not start an emotional fit and ease the situation. Silence is the only thing that will help us live through this moment, make it better. Ease the pain, slowly building up in my chest and going up my throat. 

I have never thought that I would feel this pain for someone. That I would feel it when they leave.

The cab stops with a jerk and we get out, Martin getting out his black suitcase. I look around, trying to recognise any familiar faces in the crowd. Somebody is shouting and when I turn around, Martin is surrounded by fans. They laugh and scream in shocked excitement. Martin takes pictures with everyone, dismissing only the last disappointed fans. The look a bit unhappily, but still smile through their fake frowns.

"Aline," Martin calls, while I am watching everything from a little distance. 

He smiles, as I come closer to him. He embraces me in a hug. I just stand there, my arms around his neck, wanting really badly for this moment to last forever. I want all the people to freeze, just stop the time.

I notice people staring at us, but still don't say anything, neither do anything. I don't have to care about what they think. Nobody should judge me for my relationship with Martin. It's not their choice, but mine and I have the right to choose. 

Martin lets go and I force a sad smile. He doesn't look happy either, however still grins at me. A tiny tear wells up at my eye and I brush it off with my finger, leaving all the smiling. I want my emotions to be real right now, I want everyone to see them. I want Martin to see, how much I love him. 

How much I love him.

I have never thought that I love him. I thought it was affection, just an attraction of two people being close together. Maybe, we could have been friends, but we decided to take everything onto a different level. It was probably meant that way. 

"This is the end," I exhale, bile building up my throat. 

"It's not," Martin assures, giving me a concerned look. "I will be back sooner than you know it."

"I hope so," I sigh, wiping a tear from my face, turning my gaze away from Martin. He cups my face in his warm face, whispering something softly into my ear. His voice makes shivers travel down my spine and not only there, every single one of my organs churns and twirls. 

"Everything will end soon," he whispers, as he hugs me tightly. 

I keep silent, enjoying the moment and wanting to freeze in it forever. Martin and I let go, sorrowfully looking at each other. 

I am going to stay strong, while fighting through this. I have to stay strong, for Martin. He helped me get up and I have to stay up when his support ends.    

He turns around and I watch him go, knowing that we might never see each other. It's like in those sad movies - one of them leaves and both of them struggle through loneliness, to see each other again. The script is made that way and I guess, our life is made that way as well. 

Turning around and walking out of the airport, I catch the closest cab and ask him to drive me to my house. The driver doesn't question my tears and drives us silently, through the wet streets of New York, rain hitting the roof and the windshield. 

The weather is crying. Crying with me for Martin. Maybe, I shouldn't be that emotional, but right now, I don't care if it looks fake or over the top. Right now, I just want to be in my house, doing nothing and trying to forget everything from that week. Bury it until next time. 

People are walking quickly under the rain, some with umbrellas, some without. Many dive into the nearest cafes and shops, just to escape the weather. Although it's noon, it feels later than this. Dark, gray cloud are covering the sky and the sun, blocking away the warm sunlight, making the world seem cold and very contrasting. 

Even though it's crowded outside, something inside me feels empty and lonely, although I shouldn't really feel that. My parents are going to come back soon from their business trip. I won't be alone in this, but I won't have anybody supporting me like Martin did. 

I feel like opening the door of the taxi, while it's still driving, and getting out, running away. Somewhere far, where problems won't haunt me and my past will finally let go. Somewhere, where I will feel safe and comfortable. 

The taxi stops and I pay the driver, giving him extra tips. He deserves them. I close the passenger door loudly and open the door to my house. It's silent and creepy, like nobody has lived here for a long time. Every flat surface suddenly became very dusty and every sound, loud or quiet, echoes through the stale air. 

I step in, locking the door behind me and switching on lamps everywhere around the house. I have never been so creeped out and scared in life, probably since I was a ten year old kid. Who would even be afraid of the dark, in their own house, in the middle of the day? 

However, it feels so intimidating and mysterious. You can't see anything in darkness - a perfect hiding place for some creep with a chainsaw, lurking somewhere close... I have to stop thinking about this right now! If I will start thinking about shit, it will happen in a matter of seconds. 

Turning on the TV, I stare at the screen, waiting for something to come up. A TV show comes up, which I don't watch, however I still watch it, my brain not being able to function properly. I go to the kitchen to get myself some food. The fridge is quite empty, so I grab leftovers of yesterday's pizza, throwing the box into the bin. 

I notice something familiar in it - a hoodie. Marcus' hoodie, which was given to me after that party, Martin played at. I take it out, pressing it against my cheeks and smelling the familiar scent. Smoke, alcohol and something different. The smell of burning wood, so good. 

Coming up to the sofa, I lie down, touching his hoodie, not letting go of his memory, which I shouldn't do. I should let go of him and leave him. His smell, his voice, his eyes - they are all stuck inside my head, constantly nagging on me. 

A loud knock makes me snap back to reality. I get up and open the door, finding a piece of paper, which I surely know. It's them, again. I pick it up, opening it and looking at the words.

Still can't let him go, after everything you have done?