Promise? • phan

Dan

Plz don't correct my grammar:) I don't read over my things even though I should and auto correct is the cause most of the time
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While writing this pinof7 is playing and they are currently making fanfic.
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Dear Dan,
Pj here. I hope things are going well for you in there. We miss you a lot. Not much has changed at school. I've been laying off Phil a but because it seems so weird without you in our school halls. I hope you get out soon. Your mom and Tilly came over for dinner last night because my family is concerned. Your mom has been working more, leaving Tilly home alone, and she's far too young. We are worried she will be taken away. But don't stress Dan, I'm sure everything will be okay. Love you bud.
-Sincerely, peej

Wait. Taken away? Tilly can't get taken away, she needs me! God I knew this would happen. Why did I let myself get here? Why can't I be nice? Why the fuck can't I be normal?

Dear Dan,
Hey it's Chris as you know, well things have definitely changed at school. Im not sure what pj has told you but im sure its a lie. He has changed a lot Dan. Like, i try to harass phil but pj sticks up for him. Phil is getting better, maybe even better than you, if you are getting better that is. And i hate to say this, but Phil and pj are now together. How did it happen? im still not sure. Him and i are distant now. I don't know if he is using him for something or if he truly likes him. Hope to see you soon Dan. Love you bud.

-Chris

How did this happen? Ive only been gone for what, 2 months almost? If pj liked him, why didn't he tell me? i felt betrayed even though i shouldn't. I don't like phil. No homo. Why would he even ask phil out? He acted like he hated him just as much as i did. Do, i mean do. I hate phil.

"Mate, are you okay?" Oliver asks from his bed. I look up from where I was reading my letters and shook my head, "no I'm not. My best friend started dating Phil." I told him since he already knew who everyone was.

"And why are you upset? Do you like Phil? Or your best friend?" Oliver asked. I shook my head once again, "oh gosh no. I hate Phil. And pj is my best friend."
Oliver smirked at me which was confusing, " to me it sounds like you are trying to convince yourself that you hate Phil. Maybe you like him but you are too afraid to come out, so instead you beat him up for making you feel that way so that way you try and convince yourself that you actually do like him when reality, you have a hopeless crush."

My eyes go wide. I'm shocked. He just said all of that like he knew exactly what was going on in my life. But I actually hate Phil , I don't like him. Nope not at all. No homo. But maybe- "No Oliver, I do not like phil." I groaned in frustration because he still didn't believe me.

"Whatever you say Dan. Just stop fucking with him, it'll end up horrid if you do."

I thought about it for a second and yeah maybe I could lay off but it makes me pissed that pj lied to me about everything. It's like I can't trust him anymore. Ugh what the hell am I going to do? Who can I actually trust? Ever since Ive got here things have gone downhill. Only one more month then i can get out of here and go back home and hopefully have things go back to normal.

Dear Pj,

please keep tilly around. you know how much she means to me. i cant lose her as well. And nothings changed? at all? hmm. okay. You know you can trust me. I'm always here for you, never forget. im cutting this short, love you peej. Stay honest with me.

Sincerely Dan.

{The normal's, they make me afraid The crazies, they make me feel sane I'm nuts, baby, I'm mad, The craziest friend that you've ever had You think I'm psycho, you think I'm gone Tell the psychiatrist something is wrong Over the bend, entirely bonkers You like me best when I'm off my rocker Tell you a secret, I'm not alarmed So what if I'm crazy? The best people are All the best people are crazy, all the best people are Where is my prescription? Doctor, doctor please listen My brain is scattered You can be Alice, I'll be the mad hatter.}

Dear Chris,

I am getting better. And really? Phil and Pj? please tell me this is some sick story you are trying to fool me with. Pj should not be with phil. at all. I cant believe he would even do this! does he not care about us anymore? I have always been there for him! Then he goes and dates Phil? the flaming homosexual mute? Since when does he like guys?! I'm not against him since i'm bi myself but still, It is Phil. Why him. Ugh i don't think i will ever get over this. Sorry for ranting chris, hope you are well. Love you buddy.

-Dan

"Mate? I know i should not have looked, but be careful what you say and how you word it. You sound very jealous." Oliver said quickly then walked to the Officer to use the kiosk. I Roll my eyes because, me? jealous? no. i could care less about phil. Its the fact that pj lied to me. and didn't tell me.I stand up from where i was writing my letters and walked to the officer so he can mail them.

Afterwards I decided to skip dinner today as I wasn't feeling all to well after today. It's so lonely here, sure Oliver is my friend but it's different. I want Chris and pj back. But I'm still upset with pj.

As I was falling asleep, my eyes fluttering shut, I felt something tickle my nose. I shake my head but it was still there. I groaned and slowly open my eyes to see a moth sitting on my nose staring at me.

"Holy fucking shit! Get it off!" I jump out of bed screaming, hitting my own face in attempt to get it off. I screamed loud enough to wake Oliver up. He rolls out of bed and grabs me. "Dan, it's fine. You killed it. I will throw it out yeah? Just lay back down please." He kissed my head and laid me down. What the actual fuck.

I decided not to linger on it for long since I was tired.

I started to think about what Oliver said. Was I jealous of pj? Am I crying because he's dating Phil now? Yes. Yes I am. Why?

Because I, Daniel James Howell, Is in love with Philip Michael Lester, the mute.

Yes, I bully, and beat up Phil, because my family is homophobic and I don't want to fail them. I want to be normal, not gay. So yes, I will stay who I am and away from Phil. No homo.

So I think.

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So I video above is my mom reacting to jacksepticeye and at the end I show here a phan smut video and she slaps me in the face😂 "you watching this shit?" Her words😂 check it out please and subscribe:)

QOTD: thoughts on Phan in America now?

(Dan was at the airport today or yesterday so I'm sure he's in Florida now)

AOTD: I'm so overwhelmed what the hell do I do now that they are in my timezone? AKSNSJSK