The Silent Female Alpha

Chapter 22

*Ahh! This is getting harder. Sorry for the very late update. *

(Selyen's POV)

I didn't thought it will be this awkward when they leave us alone. Ian stared at me with that curious face of his and I couldn't dare to look at him in the eye and stare at his desk instead. The guilt of lying to him arise again and the urge to apologize is so strong and Diane whined at the thought of him ignoring us. But he's not. He's not ignoring or avoiding us at all; He wanted to be in my circle of trust, he wanted me to believe him and come clean with everything. 

Mentally breaking the silence, I say. 'No offense but,' I sighed and slouch in my seat. 'I don't want to look weak any more. Asking a help from you will just make me look like a weaker. You of all people know what I mean.' I looked away from his intense eyes.

A sound of the empty chair beside me being pull back make me look up and surprise to see Ian sitting on the empty chair beside me. He have his elbows on his knees as he lean forward and stare anywhere but me. He was frowning and seemed to be in a deep thought too. I watch him as he set his jaw. 

"I know." He said after a moment. "I understand but I do know you need this help. The rogues are there outside your pack, an obstacle between you and Robert. I know you are strong enough to take them down now but Ivan is dangerous man. Now that he have wolfbane, silver and a witch as his weapons, you can get hurt or worse."

'After what I did,' I say slowly without looking at him. 'You still worry about me?'

"Should I not?" He looked at me. 

I meet his eyes and gulp. There's anger in his blue one. 'I lied right at your face. Aren't you going to reject me now?'

Ian flinched at the word reject. Rejection is a process where you break the mate bond with your mate. There's two way of rejection; one is that both sides agree to break their bonds and two is one of them reject his or her mate even though the mate refuse to be reject. Both ways will end up missing your other part of yourselves but the second option gives a chance for the mate to accept back his/her rejected mate. 

"How can I reject you after what we have yesterday?" he asks softly.

'What we have was nothing!' I snarl. 'Ian, I lied almost everything to you. How can you say we have something between us when everything I did was hiding the truth from you.'

"Yes you lied, hide and keep the truth away from me but that doesn't change the way I felt about you!" He growl. He turned his chair so he was facing me. "Yes, I'm hurt that you kept it all hidden from me when I'm obviously your mate but I understand why; You're afraid that I took your pack from you."

I stare at him in shock. How can he know the reason so accurately? 'Ian, I-'

"No, I'm not finish." He cut me. "Let me tell you something. It's natural for an Alpha to keep something away due to his or her strong possessiveness. Since you know I'm the Alpha of this pack, you calculate whether you can trust me as a mate or as a conqueror so yes, I know why you did it and yes, I felt something between us. So fuck that reject shit because I would never reject you no matter what you did. I forgive you."

I stare at him in disbelieve. Those last three words have me frozen for a second. He forgave me? Is that possible? I mean can I be easily be forgiven? Ian knew the reasons why I kept it all hidden and yet he still want me, still forgive me after the act that I have pulled. Why? Why did he forgive me that easily? What's his reason to forgive? Goddess, so many questions in my mind and I'm dying to know from him. I'm so confused.

'Why?' I ask and unable to help myself I got up from my seat as if it burned me. 'Why do you forgive me so easily, Ian? I'm not suspecting you to try to take my pack from me anymore because I can see and read it myself from your face. But after all I've done? Why would you forgive me, a mate that act like a double agent and-'