Chapter 1

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*That is a picture of Alissa above. Ignore the outfit. And sorry about the itallics at the end something is wrong with my computer and I can't get it to change back. Sorry.*

Hi! My name's Alissa. And I'm an orphan at an adoption center. My parents died when I was three years old when they went on a business trip to Texas. The plane crashed half way there in a thunderstorm. I was sent to the orphanage a couple weeks later when they reported that there were no survivors. That was back in 2004. It's 2017 and I'm 13 and still haven't been adopted. Well haven't been adopted permanently.

See I had been adopted maybe 2 or 3 times. They abused me and they were sent to jail for maybe..... 55 years? I think so. That was about when I was 10 or 11 and they were both within the same year. I almost started cutting. Almost. I didn't and stopped before anything happened. The closest I had ever came to doing it was when I had been brought back the third time and all you cold see was a faint line. It wasn't a cut. You really couldn't even see it.

"Alissa! Come on! We've got to get ready for adoption day!" my room mate and best friend, Hope, tells me dragging me out of my bed playfully and setting me on the ground half gently half harshly.

"Ow! Alright! Alright! I'll get up!" I say standing with support of the bed. I loved Hope. She's the only one I've truly ever opened up to. I told her all my secrets and she told me all of hers. I trusted her with my biggest secret: I'm gay. I don't know why that's such a big deal to me to be honest. It just is. I've come out to her and her only. I really trust her. We're the best of friends.

We met a couple years after i first got here when I was five. Her parents literally threw her onto the sidewalk. I rushed out of the building and helped her up. We got to know each other and were best friends ever since. Just two days ago we celebrated the 8th year we've know each other: when we first met.

I was so casual. I was wearing skinny jeans a black T-Shirt and red converse with my long hair pulled back out of my face in a pony tail. Hope on the other hand was wearing a hot pink skirt, white leggings, a white T-shirt, and hot pink glossy high heels with her hair wavy and put down pushed back behind her ears.

We sat down in the lobby before Mrs.Hanks told us to perform some of our songs to entertain the kids. We were the oldest which meant nobody wanted us most of the time. They wanted the three and four year olds or the infants. We sat down on wooden stools and turned on the Playstation so we'd have back ground music. We searched through Nightcore songs before discovering two. A female version of Take Me To Church and Take A Hint. We decided to start with Take A Hint.

Why I am always hit on by the boys I never like? I can always see them coming from the left and from the right. (And so on I'm too lazy to write out the lyrics and if you want to hear the song we've got YouTube for a reason my dears.)

We then moved on to the female version of Take Me To Church. This time Hope played piano while I played Guitar for the background. I was singing since she can't sing and play piano at the same time.

"My lovers got humor. She's the giggle at a funeral. Knows everybody's disapprovals. I should've worshiped him sooner. If the heavens ever did speak, he's the last true mouth piece. Every Sunday is getting more bleak. A fresh poison each week. We were born sick. You heard them say it. My church offers no absolutes. She tells me worship in the bedroom. The only heaven I'll be sent to is when I'm alone with you. I was born sick but I love it. Command me to be well. Ayy. Amen. Amen. Amen. Take me to church and I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of my lies. I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife. Offer me that deathless death oh good god let me give you my life. Take me to church and I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of my lies. I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife. Offer me that deathless death oh good god let me give you my life! If I'm the peagan of the good times then my lovers the sunlight. o keep the god on my side he demands a sacrifice. Drain the whole sea, get something shiny. Something meaty for the main course. That's a fine looking high horse. what you got in the stable? We've a lot in starving faithful. That looks tasty. That looks plenty. This is hungry work. Take me to church and I'll worship like a dog at the shine of my lies. I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife offer me that deathless death oh good god let me give you my life. No masters or kings when the retual begins. There is no sweeter innocence than our gentle sins. And when that day comes: that sad earthly scene. Only then I am human, only then I am clean. Oh. Amen! Amen. Take me to church and I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of my lies. I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife. Offer me that deathless death oh good god let me give you my life!"

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