Boyfriend ( Justin Beiber Love Story )

Chapter 4 ❤

" Please Julia! Just listen to what I have to say! PLEASE!" Justin begged. This has been going on for days now. When he came to my house, I just closed the door and ignored him. I dont want to forgive him. What he has done to me is unforgivable. I feel like all Im doing is repeating myself.

" I dont want to hear it." I walked into my street, Justin still behind me, annoying me. I do feel a little guilty giving him the shoulder, but I need to keep myself safe. I cant risk this.

" Come on Julia. Please find it in your heart to forgive me. I dont know what else to say to you. I cant sleep knowing Ive done this to you. Please. Julia. I beg of you." I feel bad. But Im so scared to trust him. I dont know what to do. I dont know what to think. I have my moms words repeating in my head. I have my mind yelling at me. Im scared. I really am. I just dont think I can cope with this crap. Why am I given this life?

I bit my lip in frustration. I looked at Justin. I hate him so much.

" I dont think I can ever forgive you. I dont think I will forget either. How do you expect me to even look at you? Ill be honest I do feel bad that Im being a bitch, but then I remember why I am. You will never understand what you put me through. I just need time alone. Its best if you stay away from me." I walked away but I stopped when I heard what came out of his mouth.

" You self arm dont you? You have an eating disorder too. I saw your cuts when you passed out.... And your really skinny.... I can see why you wont forgive me. I ruined you. We ruined you. " Furious. Mad. Anger running through my veins. I was tempted to slap him, but instead I walked away. Not turning back. I just wanted to get home. Its times like these when you want someone to talk to, but You just dont have anyone.

You all proably think I'm being harsh, but put yourself in my position. Coming to school everyday, getting harsh comments thrown at you, getting hit constanyly, getting thrown in lockers and being locked in there till a teacher comes past, getting locker notes with death threats, getting shit thrown at you during class. Then one day, you main Bully, the main reason to why all this is happening is suddenly sorry. After what? After I cried myself to sleep almost every day. After I never kept a meal down and lost a ton of weight. After I sliced every inch of my body to get rid of the pain they caused for me. Now you tell me. Would you forgive and forget everything?

I got home and ran to my room. I couldn't keep my emotions in. I cried. The tears staining the floor. I wipe my tears with my sleeve. Why god? Why did you put me in this world? Why is me who has to go through this? Why cant I turn back time... Why cant mom be here to hold me? I wonder how different things would be if she were here. Dad doesnt say much about her, But I can see it in his eyes. The love he has for her. I can tell she is a strong women. I would die, just to be half the person she was. But I'm not. Im weak. Im nothing.

" Julia?" I heard my dad say behind the door. I wiped my tears away quickly.

" Yeah dad?" He walked in. There was no hiding that I was crying. My eyes were red and puffy, and my cheeks were also red. He looked at me. I could tell that he noticed that I was crying. like I said my dad doesn't open up.

" Umm.. Im making dinner now... So yeah.. "

" Im not hungry dad, Ive had a lot of lunch at school." I lied.

" Oh um okay. Is there anything you need?" Yes dad, I need, you to give me a hug and tell me everything is going to be okay, I need mom. I need Everyone to disappear. I need a normal teenage girl life. Thats what I need.

" No I'm okay."

" You sure?" I nodded. He gave me one last glance, then left my room. I sighed. Why is this life so hard?