Boyfriend ( Justin Beiber Love Story )

Chapter 9 ❤

" What are you doing here?" I said with my voice scared and worried.

" Ive been here for 2 days.... What are you doing? Your meant to be in your bed. " I have been officially busted. He always ruins every moment for me. Why does he always have to do that. Every time he does he ruins something again. Wait why the hell is he here anyways? He was the cause for this. Im so confused. I have so many questions to ask but I just don't know how to ask them. And I don't even know if he will give me honest answers.

Ive lost all trust for everyone. I just cant seem to get my head around things.

" You did this to me. Your the reason why I am in here. I should've never trusted you. Your just like everyone else. Liars. Your a bully. Im going to say this once. Leave me alone. If you don't. Im calling the police. " I walked away, but before I could, Justin grabbed my wrist and pulled me towards him. My body was close to his. I could hear his breathing clear. He moved closer to my ear and whispered.

" Im never leaving you. I promised. I said I will never hurt you. " It sent chills down my back. But it didn't change the fact that I believe he was the cause of this.

" You also said you would protect me. But look where I ended up." I pulled my hand out of his grip and continued walking out the hospital. Everything I said to him, I don't regret it. I regret nothing. I don't even feel bad or an ounce of or sorrow or sympathy for that pathetic human. He's nothing but an arrogant bully who thinks just because he is famous, he can get what he wants. Doesn't work like that.. Especially not with me. I think after today, It has opened my eyes to so many things. That I should never trust someone who has ruined my life in so many ways. I should stop making the same mistakes. Im such an idiot.

I sat outside the hospital on a bench. I did nothing but cry. I felt disgusting. Fat. Ugly. Hideous. I felt like a fat slob on this bench. Knowing the fact that I have food running through my system, is killing me. All my years of hard work, down the toilet. I hate this depression. Why cant I be normal? Why cant I be accepted? What have I don't to deserve this. Look at me, Im a broken mess. I can no longer be repaired. I forever broken. I will always have scars, I will always feel pain, I will always feel disgust. I just want to die. So i can stop feeling like this. So I can stop disappointing everyone, even my self. I just don't want to live anymore. Im done. With everything. Mom said things would get better, but I feel like they have gotten worse.

I wiped my remaining tears off my face. I have no where to go. I don't even know where my dad is.

" Please come back inside Julia. Please... Not for me, but for yourself, your dad." I turned around. And there was Justin, looking at me with his crystal brown eyes. Anger rushed through my body. Then it hit me. He now knows about my issues. He is going to ruin my life now that he knows. The worst bit is. I cant do anything about it.

" I just want to say a few things to you. Your probably not going to ever believe me. But thats okay, I just want you to listen." I tightened my fist. Wanting to his him so bad, but I controlled my anger and listened to what he had to say.

" When I promise something, I never break it. No matter what. I didn't know what was going on at the party, I didn't know liz had that planned, and if I did know, do you honestly think I would've let her, after I just promised you that I wouldn't hurt you ever? And now finding out everything issue you have, and also realising that it was all my fault, Do you know how that makes me feel? You will never understand. To me, bullying you was just for fun, but I didn't know that It would have this much affect. To be honest, I didn't only do it for popularity, I didn't because, I felt a little jealous of you. I know its weird to have a guy be jealous of a girl, but you had this strong shield, and I wish I had that. You had this attitude that you didn't care, And I wanted that. I just wanted to do everything in my power to take it away from you. I didn't realise that, I completely broke down your walls. I didn't know that a little bit of fun would have this much affect. Ive already explained this to you, I know and your probably sick of hearing the same thing, But I just want you to get your head our of the gutter and listen to whats actually coming out of my mouth. My heart. I mean every word. Julia Im sorry. I wasn't the one who put you in here. I would never even! If you could see what happened after she threw in the pool you would see, but here you go again. Believing what you want to." He began to walk away. Everything he said was true. I believe everything that I tell myself. And I because I have had such a rough life, I never actually give people a chance when they mean every word. I probably wont ever understand how it feels for someone to see me go though this. I could imagine how my dad feels right now. Gosh he probably feels like he was the cause of it.

" Wait.... Stay." He turned around, and gave me a warm smile, and walked towards me to give me a hug. Gracefully. I hugged back. He held on to me tightly, as I did the same. I cried into his chest. He still hugged me. Rubbing my back. I know he could feel my spine.

" Now I want you to do one thing for me. I know its hard, but I promise it will be alright. I want you to go in there, and get healthy. I will be here every step of the way. I promise you, Ill never let you go. I want you to recover. I want you to be healthy. I want you to be that old Julia we all fell in love with. The one I was jealous of. " I nodded. I couldn't believe what I was doing. I was walking back into my worst nightmare. I didn't want to get better. I was frozen, I was doing everything he was telling me. This is the hardest thing I have ever thought of doing.

*****

I woke p to the sound of the TV. It was the hockey game. Sports are not my thing. As you saw before. But back in the days, I was a runner. I used to run in competitions at school. I just felt free. I felt like I could run away from all my pain and issues.

" She's awake!" I heard my dad say. My throat was feeling dry. I sat up on the hospital bed. I could tell they got extra blankets cause they were still warm.

" Water please" My dad handed me a cup after he poured me some. I drank like I've never seen water in my life.

" How long was I asleep for?"

" A few hours." My dad said. He kept looking at me. I could see the emotion in his eyes. It hit me then. My dad doesn't want to lose me. He's already broken at the fact that he lost mom, and me putting myself through this, wasn't making it any better. In a way this is a good thing for me to realise, cause it makes me want to recover. I cant keep putting this stuff on me because it doesn't only affect me, it affects everyone around me.

I looked at my feeding tube. I tried hard not to cry. If only you understood how hard this is. To not want to get better, but have to for the sake of others. You might all think that If I just eat something I will get better, but its not like that. Once you have an eating disorder your going to have to deal with it for the rest of your life. Even when you get better, It will still cross your mind. Thats why its so hard for me. I don't know... I don't think its even easy to explain. I see it as you have to go through this mess to know how it actually feels...

" Well me and you dad figured out that you sleep talk." Justin said.

" What did I say?!" I was hoping I didn't say anything embarrassing. Justin had a little smile on his face and my dad looked like he was embarrassed for me. I felt my cheeks go a little red. I hope I didn't say anything about Justin or something.

The doctor walked in the room. Great! Now I'm not going to know what I said.He looked like he was in his 30s. And he looked friendly. I smiled at him as he did the same.

" Glad to see you smiling Julia. How are you feeling?" I had to be honest. He's the doctor, its not like he cant see whats wrong with me.

" Very weak." It was true. I did feel right. I felt sick, and I just felt like I didn't have the energy to life up my arm. I just wanted to pass out.

" Well I hope its okay If I speak to your dad about some things, Is it that okay with you?" He asked my dad.

" I want to know what this is about. If its about me and my health I think I have a right to know." I demanded. I hate when people do that. if its about me say it to my face. He sighed and gave my dad a look. My dad nodded, indicating that its okay. I was ready for what ever was coming.

" Julia's eating disorder is at a dangerous rate. Any minute, she could die. Her body has no vitamins, no fibre. Her body is running on nothing but water. We are trying the best we can to get her fully recovered, but there is a high chance that she might not make it."