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-Hee Young-

Walking up to my childhood house i squeezed Jungkook's hand out of nervousness.

It's been so long since I've been here.... has anything changed?

Walking up to the familiar door i cautiously knocked on the door

It was exactly here... my first kiss. Me and my crush at the time came back from the library because he insisted to walk me home even if I only lived 5 minutes from the library. It was quick and rushed, but who could judge him. We were 16.

"Calm down, you're making me nervous" Jungkook whispered probably feeling how fast my heart was beating.

Taking a deep breath, my mother came to open the door. With a small smile on her face she welcomed us in.

"I'm glad you could make it Hee Young. You too jungkook" she says nodding in Jungkook's presence

"You too Mrs Park" Jungkook flashes my mom one of his famous bunny smiles making my mom grin.

"Oh please call me Yerin. Hwa Young is in the backyard with her friends" my mom says before disappearing into the kitchen

"Do you think I made a good impression?" Jungkook whispers once she leaves

"Well... she's never once asked how any of my friends to call her by her first name. And if she wasn't my mom I would have thought she was flirting with you to be completely honest" i say letting out a soft laugh before opening the French doors to the backyard

"JUNGKOOK!! YOU MADE IT!!!" My sister yells

Wow thanks for acknowledging my presence Hwa Young.

______________________________________________________________________________

After the typical screaming and fangirling of my sister's friends by the fact that "she" knew Jungkook we ate cake, gave our gift (a signed bts album and poster) and decided to drive to the park nearby for a walk. The park across our first encounter at the coffee shop.

"Your sister seemed very happy" Jungkook said intertwining our hands

"Probably because she will be the next topic floating around her highschool" i said letting out a soft chuckle

"You know we still kinda need to talk about this whole Junhoe situation..." He said

Annoyed by the fact that he brought him up now, I suddenly feel a thumping pain in my head.

-Jungkook-

All of a sudden Hee Young let's go of my hand, taking a seat on the nearest bench.

Seeing her rub her temples her face screamed pain

"Hee Young! Are you okay? What's wrong?" I ask panicked by her sudden actions.

"J-just get my purse from the car. Please" she says through gritted teeth

Rushing over to the car i quickly snatched her purse

-Hee Young-

Breath in.

Breath out.

Breath in.

Breath out-

"Here" Jungkook says out of breath

Rummaging through my purse i grab the small white jar and water. Taking out two pills, i gulped them down with some water.

Exhaling deeply i close my eyes and rest my back on the bench.

-Jungkook-

Staring at her I grabbed the white bottle and read the label.

Stress pills; Park Hee Young

"Y-you've been taking stress-"

"Please don't talk about this now Jungkook. I'm already over the edge-"

"No. I'm not going to stop, you never told me?! How long have you been taking these" i ask but she just sat there looking exhausted

"You have a mouth, tell me. Hee Young i should kno-"

"You're not the only one stressed okay?! If you think its stressful being an Idol, try dating one! Hell we aren't even dating. You don't understand... I feel like I'm the only one in this relationship sometimes if you can even call it one. Jungkook I've been taking these since that whole Junhoe situation. I have a life of my own too. I have problems of my own, and you putting your problems on me all of a sudden... i-its just too much sometimes okay? I'm sorry I hid it from you but I knew you were stressed and you wouldn't understand. I didn't want to worry you even more okay?"

-Hee Young-

I didn't even realize I've started to cry in the middle of everything. Maybe I've gotten so use to crying by now it just happens...

"Well maybe if you didn't want me to worry you should just get out of my life" Jungkook said

"J-Jungkook..." i croaked out. My mind not able to comprehend his reaction.

"Listen if you feel so alone and don't want to worry about my life whatsoever than maybe we shouldn't even keep in contact" He said calmly.

I wish he was yelling. So I could blame his harsh words in the heat of the moment. But instead he said it so calmly, his words of venom must have been genuine.

-Jungkook-

"You dont know what you're saying" Hee Young repeated over and over.

Probably mostly to reassure herself more than me.

I don't know what I'm saying. But I just couldn't stop.

"Maybe we just need time to rethink everything before we get in anything serious" my mouth said, but my mind wasn't there

It was as if my mind was yelling at me to scream I LOVE YOU HEE YOUNG! Please don't leave me. But my mouth didn't agree, for it did its own thing.

"Serious? So you kissing me wasn't serious enough? Me rushing to you whenever you're in need of help didn't mean anything to you? I wish I could just leave you without a regret but don't you see how much you mean to me?" Hee young asks, looking at me as if she was giving me one last chance to fix everything.

You mean the world to me! Not even, you are my world Hee Young.

"I-I guess I was silly enough to think you would have seen me as more than just a pretty face. I should just go already. You have a world to conquer and I'm in your way." Hee young whispered

No! I want to conquer the world with you not without you. Please...

I wanted to hold onto her and never let her leave. But my mind told me she would be better off without me. I was an obstacle she had to pass and leave.

-Hee Young-

"H-hee Young..."

"I'm sorry. I should just go..." i said before grabbing my purse and going towards the first place I could spot.

The coffee shop

A/n:

I decided not to post a tag or anything bc i realized probably not many people wanted that LOL. But I just want to thank you all for 12k reads :)) love you all to bits! Talk to you soon.

Love you all,
Patricia

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