A Deeper Cliche

Chapter 3

Sunday, April 10 - The Church Sermon

Pastor Henry Jacobson: At verse 18 in Ephesians 5, Paul seems to get back to what he had been talking about at the end of chapter 4 and the beginning of chapter 5. How we treat others and interact them. But in the middle, of this chapter, he'd gone off about talking about being in the light and not the darkness. But as he get back, he changes courses a bit. Before he was more talking to an individual person about how to act towards others, whether specifically Christians or not, but now he's really talking to the whole body of Christ. The whole church. And how we should act with each other. He starts off talking about being filled with the Spirit and being sober and not taken away by drunkeness. He then talks about goes on to talk about speaking to each other in songs and encouraging each other in such a way. Then, he again switches directions and talks about how husbands and wives, children and parents, and slaves and masters should treat each other. But right before he does that, he says that we should submit ourselves to one another. That basically sums up everything that he'd been saying. We are supposed to basically make ourselves servants to one another. We as a church family are supposed to treat each other with respect and love and helping each other out when we are in need. Lets us read this now.

Me: *reading Ephesians 5:18-6:9*

Pastor: This is something we always need to work on. Not only do we need to work on relationships with our spouses, if you're married, our kids if you have some, or our bosses or employees if you have a job, but we need to do the same within the church. Us leaders need to lead the same way parents lead children. We need to tell you when you're doing wrong, but do it in a loving way that can build us up. But, the only way we can really do that is if you allow it. If like a child, you choose to submit to our authority when we need to wield it. Now I want you to take a few minutes and start reflecting on your own lives about the things you are struggling with and how you're treating others.

Too many emotions were flowing through my mind. What Tabitha and Cherry had been trying to tell me was starting to make sense. I could see it. And I hated it! I really hated it! I'd always hated being wrong. But being shown that I wasn't as good of a Christian as I should have been. That stung like no other. It killed my pride. The pride that I should have seen was what was destroying me the most. It was the sin that was coming and taking over me. I was sinning, and being as bad as Tabitha and her somewhat loose mouth at times. I was even close to being as bad as Penelope with her ridiculously loose morals. I truly was a sinner. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't be perfect. So, I prayed. I prayed for myself for the first time in quite a while. I'd been so prideful thinking that I didn't need prayer that it'd been way too long since I'd done that. Instead, I'd just prayed for non-Christians to come to God and stop their sinning. Or for Cherry and Tabitha to see their sins and stop getting pulled away from God that they couldn't fully seen. I was so blinded by what they were doing, I couldn't see the pride that I had. I really got Jesus' words in the sermon on the mount. I couldn't see the stupid blank in my own eyes. And I hated it. I hated how bad of a person I'd become.

Sunday, April 10 - After Church Service

Tabitha: Sometimes I seriously think you're dad must be able to talk to God to know what we're going through to give us exactly what we need. It's crazy amazing.

Cherry: Trying being his daughter. It even more often seems like he's saying something pointed right at me for what I've done. Especially if he ever talks about dating or sex stuff, I can feel his eyes looking right at James and I even when he's looking to the other side of the room. It's hard.

Tabitha: Yeah, but it's always so convicting. I'd probably end up just letting myself go more like Penelope if I didn't have this to hold me in.

Cherry: Come on, you're not that bad, Tabitha. I'm still not convinced the Bible's as condemning of cusswords in general as everyone says. And besides that you're nearly perfect.

Tabitha: Anyways, I'm glad you're dad can do that. The church-

Me: Would you just stop it already!

Tabitha and Cherry: *turning quickly towards me*

Me: I get it. I get that I've been screwed up. You don't have to rub it in!

Cherry: What are you talking about, Belle?

Tabitha: Yeah? I was just saying that the church really needed to hear all of that. Sometimes we all forget how important we all are to one another and that we need to be refreshed in God and all of that through each other.

Me: That's a load of crap. You just mean that I needed to hear it.

Tabitha: *staring at me completely confused*

Me: Stop trying to hide it. You're points been made.

Tabitha: *lightly grabbing my arm while I try to jerk away* What is the matter with you, Belle? You act like you've done something wrong or something. You're trying to defend yourself and we hadn't even said anything about you or to you or anything. I was just talking to Cherry about how great her dad is.

Me: Yeah, because that's all you mean.

Tabitha: *looking at Cherry* Do you remember the last time Belle was sarcastic like that?

Cherry: Nope, she usually lectures me when I say something like that.

Tabitha: *turning back toward me* I don't know what's going on, but you can always tell us, Belle. We're your friends and here to help you.

Me: I don't believe that anymore. Real friends would just come out and say it, not talk it code.

Tabitha: What the hell is it that you think we're trying to say? Because I'm dead serious. I was just talking to Cherry about her dad. Nothing more. I hadn't even realized you'd come to join us until you lost it, yelling at us.

Me: Don't be like that. It's clear you're just trying to remind me what you were saying on Friday.

Tabitha: I promise you neither Cherry nor I were trying to do anything like that. After you left, we both agreed we'd give it another week or two before we brought it up again. That's give it enough time to settle in and you'd be able to think about it. We were just trying to warn you and encourage you moving forward. But it's whatever you want to do with it in the end.

Me: That's a bunch of crap, Tabitha. It's clear that you thought that what Cherry's dad was saying points right at me because I'm not being with Christians enough, just like you said.

Cherry: What has gotten into you, Belle? She didn't mean that at all. She was telling me yesterday about how un-unified the church seemed to be getting just yesterday. So it was pretty crazy that my dad would talk about that. Especially since I didn't even mention it to him. He'd already has his sermon written by that time.

Tabitha: *looking at Cherry knowingly* I think I know what's going on.

Cherry: What?

Tabitha: She's finally gotten it. *turning to slightly smirk and smile at me before turning back to Cherry* She got convicted and hates it and is having trouble admitting it to herself. So, she thinks that anything we say remotely related to anything we talked about Friday is a hit at her.

Cherry: *turning to me* We love you, Belle. We would never try speaking you in code. At least not something like this. It'd be something far more pointless, like something with trying to get you to notice a boy or whatever. But something like this, we'll always speak to you directly about. Like we did on Friday. You have to believe us.

It didn't take long for me to admit myself that I believed them, even though I ran away right after she said that. I knew my friends. I just couldn't stand hearing Tabitha talking like that. It felt so pointed at me that it helped convict me as well. And I hated that they were so right again. I was supposed to be the smart one. There goes my pride again. I just wish I could fix it. I didn't like being this way. I loved my friends and liked when they did well. So I just couldn't understand what had gotten into me that could make me this way. But whatever it was, it needed to stop. I couldn't be that girl. I was much better than that. I was a child of God and I knew how to act. But of course, that's all easier said than done. I knew I had a long walk ahead of me.