epilogue

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E P I L O G U E 
☆☆☆

“And today, matriculants all over the country are anticipating their results. All IEB students had access to their marks as of midnight 3 January and the results for all DBE students are available online. Free State is the leading province with a 39% rate of Bachelors’ passes, followed by Gauteng with 36% and...”

I reached out my hand and switched the to Bluetooth mode.

“I’m sorry, this is just really depressing me,” I said to Anna when she gave me a side-eye.

I opened up my Spotify and pressed play on a personal playlist the app had curated for me.

“I hardly get why this is depressing, you know you passed baby,” Anna said.

“For all I know I passed with a diploma,” I replied.

“Paiten, please,” Manda replied from the backseat and rolled her eyes at me. “You passed with a bachelors and I’m sure you bagged a distinction here and there, relax,” she said.

I wished I could be like Manda and Anna and have the faith that I’d performed phenomenally but it was hard to not feel nervous.

No one but the external examinations knew what had gone down in that marking room and there was no telling how I’d get graded. It scared me that no matter how hard I’d worked, nothing was certain.

It was a little past 10:00, the December sun had already broken through the clouds and the earth all around us felt warm. Weather predictions had estimated that by midday it would be a whopping 36°C.

I sang along to Walk The Moon’s  Anna Sun while I fiddled on my phone to pass the time. I was far to anxious for any normal conversation. Usually I’d be making heart eyes at my girlfriend of over a year because this was our song, or rather, my song for her but I couldn’t.

I felt a slender hand squeeze my bare thigh and when I looked to the side, Anna had her eyes on the road and drove with one hand. It was her way of reassuring me and telling me without words, that I needed to ease up because everything would be okay.

We reached my school’s entrance ten minutes later.

“I’ll be right here when you get back baby,” Anna said as she killed the engine and her sedan came to a complete stop.

“Wish me luck,” I murmured as I leaned across my seat to kiss her square on the lips.

“You don’t need it because you have hard work to back you up, I love you.”

“I love you too,” I said.

“Good luck Manda,” she said.

“Thanks, Anna,” Manda called from outside as she’d already gotten out.

All around us, other Grade 12 students were milling about in their home clothes, entering the premises and heading to their register classes where they’d find a transcript of their results. I couldn’t help but grab onto Manda’s hand.

We were dressed similarly in highwaist blue denims and Adidas sneakers. She wore a bright red crop top and I wore a summer pink blouse. My hair was loose and Manda had braided hers into two tight lines down her scalp.

She’d dyed her hair a dull ombre blonde. She looked like a carefree bird with it and I was kind of jealous I didn’t have the kind of courage to change my hair colour.

We reached the block that our register classes were at.

“Wanna start with your class first?” Manda asked me.

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