Camila's Secret ... (Age regression story)

Whisper your secrets & Mine will take over

Camila POV

We'd just finished a show and I was so stressed out. I had a million voices in my head telling me how terrible I did and telling me I deserve everything he did to me..

You see.. Shawn and I had an abusive relationship.. It took me forever to get out of it. Our relationship went downhill from day one. It really triggers flashbacks for me to think about it.

I started dwelling on it and when I snapped out of it I realized that I was crying a little bit. I wiped my eyes then made sure no one was looking.

I grabbed my favorite Paci and teddy and my footie pajamas. I quickly ran into the bathroom and changed and ran back to my bunk. I turned on kids shows on my phone and let myself slip into little space.

I was really fighting sleep cause I knew it would give me bad scary dreams. I don't know when but I did get sleepy and I fell asleep cuddling my teddy.

Nightmare
"Camila I am fucking sick of you resisting everytime I tell you to do this. FUCKING TAKE YOUR CLOTHES OFF OR YOU'RE GETTING IT!!!" Shawn yelled. I listened to him and did as he told me, knowing that if I didn't listen it would be even worse and he would hit and rape me.. I took my clothes off and he threw me around like a rag doll before forcing himself on me. I cried for him to stop but he never did....

Dinah POV

I woke up because I heard one of the girls crying.. Like crying crying. I checked in Lauren, Ally, and Mani's bunk and they were fast asleep. So it was Mila..

I opened her bunk and she was coated in a thin layer of sweat and she was trembling and crying, but she was sleeping. She must have been having a really bad nightmare.

"Mila.. Mila, wake up." I shook her gently. It didn't seem to be working and I didn't want to wake the other girls up, so I figured I'd carry her out to the front lounge area of the tour bus and try and wake her up there.

I picked her up and she clung to a teddy bear that she had been holding. I realized that she had a Paci in her mouth, she did have on footie pajamas too, but it's Camila so I didn't really think twice about that.

I sat down on the couch and held Camila. "Mila. Wake up. You're okay, DJ has you. " I was getting really worried. She shot awake and started sobbing herself into hysterics. "Hey. Mila, slow.. You need to breathe. Come on, breathe with me." I took her hands in mine and looked into her eyes and took deep breaths and she eventually calmed down but held onto me like her life depended on it.

I layed down with her still in my arms. I had no intentions of letting her go back to sleep by herself, she was terrified and I wasn't about to do that to her. I rubbed circles on her back until she had relaxed and melted into my arms.

Since she was calm I decided to try and connect the dots. All of us had stuffed animals so I couldn't blame her for that, I mean, if she was wearing footie pajamas when it was cold, I wouldn't think anything of it, but it is 90 degrees out. And the Paci.. Yeaaa, I can't explain that.

Honestly, it's kinda cute, but how come we never knew about this. Did she think we would judge her? I hope not, we all love her to death and wouldn't dream of judging her. She's a sweetheart.

I started to think over some of Camila's behaviors that would help me make sense of everything. She was really fragile, but it was understandable because of what she'd been through. Even Lauren, the sarcastic badass, knew she was a little different and was a lot softer and more gentle to her. She always retreated somewhere to hide when she was scared or anxious and was distant.

I looked down and Camila was whimpering a little bit. I noticed that her Paci had falled out of her mouth, I gently put it back in her mouth and she relaxed. I just got a gut feeling that Camila was hiding this from us so I Carried her into my bunk because I didn't want her to have to sleep alone incase she had another nightmare.

I made sure she was tucked in. Seeing as everyone was just taking a nap and it wasn't even night time, Camila's Eyes fluttered open and she sat up quickly and took her Paci out of her mouth and started breathing heavily, it caught me pretty off guard.

"Woah.. Mila. Slow down, you're okay. I'm not gonna judge you.. Calm down." I put an arm around her and she relaxed some as I pulled her closer. "Okay, Mila stay calm. I'm not going to judge you but please tell me what's going on, i just want to help." She shook her head. "Please Hun, just explain it and it's all going to be okay." "I..I" Camila stuttered. "It's okay love, take your time."

I held her in my arms to try and comfort her so she would tell me. "I um.. Im a little.." I was kinda confused, then I realized I'd heard about it before and saw something about it on tumblr and I knew exactly what it was. My heart softened. "Mila why didn't you just tell me?"

She looked up at me, Confusion and hope in her eyes. "You y..you know what it is?" I nodded. "I'm not gonna judge you sweetheart, wouldn't dream of it." She sighed out of relief and relaxed in my arms a little. I started to feel the need to care for Mila. I looked down at the small, petite Brunette in my arms and smiled at her. "Mila sweetie?" She looked up at me with questioning eyes. "How would you like it if I was your caregiver. If I took care of you? So you can be a little like you want."

A big smile appeared on her face and she gave me a huge hug. I giggled, "Can't. Breathe." She smiled and let go. "Sorry." She smiled. We stayed in my bunk talking over basic rules that we would have. She did want to keep it a secret for the time being, which I was okay with.

"I have one more question.." Camila asked. "Yes?" "What do I call you when I'm in my headspace and what do you call me." "You can call me whatever you're comfortable with, mommy, DJ, Dinah, and I'll call you Camila when you're out of your headspace and Camie when you're in it. Okay?" She nodded and nestled into me.

"Mommy?" I smiled at the name she'd chosen to use. "Yes sweetie?" "drink pease..?" The small girl in my lap asked me. "Of course. Do you have a Sippy?" She nodded. She went to her bunk and got a Sippy cup from under her pillow.

I picked her up and placed her on my hip and she buried her face in my shoulder. "Juice mommy?" I nodded and poured her some juice and handed her the cup. "Tank you mommy." She drank from her Sippy.

"Sweetie, I think you should change in case the girls wake up, they'll be waking up soon." She looked down and looked upset. "It's gonna be okay, I'll pick you out something." She gave me a weak smile and I picked her out an outfit. I picked her out one of my oversized hoodies with my last name on the back, and some loose pajama shorts with a frilly trim. No one would think twice about Camila wearing that, I mean it's Camila for crying out loud.

After Camie changed, she was sitting on my lap watching tv in the front lounge when I heard someone get up. I quickly took Camie's Sippy and Paci and threw it into her bunk and set Camie beside me. Ally came out and sat down on the other side of me.

Camie looked like she could burst into tears at any moment and i knew that I had to get her into the back lounge away from everyone or we were screwed.