28th February 2009 11:55:00 PM…
I called up Monish…
“The number you’re trying to reach is busy on another call…Please hold or try calling this number later…”
It was his birthday in 5 minutes…
His number ought to be busy…After all, he had so many friends…
I would have been surprised if he would not have been busy…!!
I thought of calling up after 2-3 minutes…
The same lady spoke again…
“Please call again later”
I was disturbed…
Was that person so important that he couldn’t hang up?
Was I so unimportant???
Was I so insignificant???
I could not be the first one to wish him…
Someone else talked to him for the first time in the 25th year of his life…
That feeling sucked…
I felt horrible.
I was getting that intuition that I had been replaced…
I had the vague idea that it would be Dish…
She was my closest friend back in Nadiad and I also knew she liked Monish… but I did not know Monish liked her too…
I was possessive for my relationship with Monish or perhaps it was because of my bad habit of judging situations too soon and jumping to conclusions because of the overwhelming emotional outbursts…
I did not mind Monish being with Disha, but I wanted them to TELL ME!
I wanted to KNOW.
I did not want to ASSUME and get hurt…
I wanted them to approach me and let me know that they were in a relationship…!!
I missed Monish… I missed his phone calls…
I could not hold my tears back and I literally burst out crying....
I had never ever cried for any guy in my life.
I guess Monish was the first guy and would be the only guy for whom my eyes got wet…
I badly wanted to be at Ahmedabad…
I wished for a miracle but I knew miracles only happen in bollywood movies…and my life was not one of those Yash Raj Films… It was no fairytale where the princess meets her prince despite all the obstacles…
My life was not LIFE…
I felt I was breathing… I was merely surviving… There was nothing to look forward to and nothing to live for!!!!
I wanted to hear Monish. I wanted him to pull my legs. I wanted him to taunt me.
Amidst all those chaotic thoughts, I have no idea when the tears calmed the burning emotions inside me and put me to sleep…
Sleep was such a good thing…
I was neither dead, nor awake…
Away from the terrible reality of my life to some far away world where everything was PERFECT…!!
