blue ; gallavich

19

MICKEY

I sit quietly in the police station, handcuffed to a cold, metal bench. My body is slouched in such a careless position that I am about three seconds away from flopping over and dying, which doesn't sound so terrible right now. A few men tried to talk to me but I refused, not only because they can fuck off but because I couldn't bring words to come out of my mouth. If they did it would just be a jumble of syllables and sad sounds.

I haven't been able to get the sight of Ian out of my head, and it terrifies the living shit out of me thinking about how he could be dead right now and I wouldn't even know. It's fucking infuriating that after Terry tried to kill Ian the officers still protected his ass when I tried to kill the fucker. And I can't even fathom the thought of Ian dying, and me not being able to see him all because of Terry. Fucking Terry.

Obviously Mandy had been mad for me, though,- since my emotions are numb- as I hear a door slam and chunky boots pounding on the ground. "Mandy," Lip calls, "Mandy, slow down."

"Where's Tony?" Mandy asks loudly, grabbing everyone's attention.

"Tony's out at the scene. Ma'am, is there something you need?" A muscular officer asks. In the corner of my eye I spot a familiar face- wait is he glaring at me? I see Caleb on the other side of the room fucking glaring at me! But I'm too distraught to do anything about it. My mind can't focus on anything other than the traumatizing blood spill and the deep bullet wounds on Ian's side, and all emotions have been driven away by shock. My words won't properly form and any thoughts I have turn into a pile of mush and sink into a deep abyss of nothingness.

"I need Tony. Tell him to get down here. Now." Mandy demands angrily. She looks around in search of something, and through her hostile exterior I can see the fear in her, her eyes laced with tears. Lip had kept it together while I was there, but I can see now that he had most likely been crying along with my sister and his family. I fucked up their lives, too. I almost got Ian killed, and they might lose their brother. And that's all my fault. I stare down at the floor and I have no reaction to Mandy calling my name.

"Mickey." She cries, approaching me. I continue to stare at the blue carpeted floor, my face showing how petrified I am with my eyes wide and puffy from crying. "Mickey." She says again, this time softer as she wraps her arms around me. I can feel Lip glaring at me, but his expression seems to soften as he comes to the understanding that I'm not the one to blame. But that's where he's wrong- I'm completely to blame. I'm the reason this happened in the first place.

"Mandy, you can't talk to him. He's a suspect." Caleb says, spitting that last word out venomously.

I hear Lip scoff as he grabs Caleb's shirt collar and hoists him up. People rush over to make sure Lip doesn't pull anything but he's smarter than that. "You listen to me, Caleb. You and your buddies here are going to let Mickey go so he can go see my dying brother. And for you to treat him like shit is so fucked up. You, of all people! At least Mickey cares, fuck you seem as regular as usual. Just 'cause you cheated on Ian doesn't mean you have to be so fucking heartless. So let Mickey go and-"

"Mr.Gallagher. Caleb. This isn't a family dining table so stop your rough housing. Now, Philip, Mickey here practically beat his father to death. And until we know why that is we can't release him." A female officer interrupts Lip, separating his hands from Caleb's shirt. Mandy rolls her eyes and scoffs frustratedly.

"Look, Ma'am." Mandy hisses viciously, "You know Terry, and don't say that you don't because I've seen you arresting his ass more than once. You all know Terry. What Mickey did wasn't okay or whatever but Terry tried to murder Ian. You can obviously see how the severity of this situation is affecting my brother. Our sick fuck of a father deserved it, and all of you know damn well that it's true. Shit, when you heard Terry might be dead you guys probably jumped for fucking joy. I would, too. And Mickey obviously gives way more shits about Ian than you do," Mandy growls at Caleb who stares at her sympathetically, "so because my brother was sticking up for Ian you won't let him go see if he's alright?! That's insane! What's if this was you?!"