Hannah Hart || Oneshots

As Good as it Gets | Hartsquared

"Okay everybody, that's it for tonight. Thanks for joining the ever-so-wonderful Grace Helbig, my gorgeous girlfriend over there and of course myself on this livestream. Bye guys", Hannah smiles and turns off the broadcasting.

But as soon as the words leave her mouth, Hannah knows she has done something wrong. Something incredibly wrong. Everybody sits shock still, nobody is making a sound. The way Grace looks at her says it all. But the way Grace looks at her isn't even that important. It's the way Mamrie looks at her that kills her. The beautiful redhead, that she just called her girlfriend – in front of all of the internet. It's not like Hannah meant to do it. It just slipped out of her mouth. Mamrie sure must know that, doesn't she?

But regardless whether Mamrie knows or not, she's still looking at her like that. There's anger in her eyes. Anger is fine. She can deal with anger, Hannah reckons. In fact, sometimes she even pisses Mamrie off on purpose, because – in all honesty – she thinks that Mamrie looks super-hot when she gets angry. So if it was just anger it would be alright. But there's more behind the emerald orbs that the short blonde adores so much. There's disappointment, the feeling of being betrayed. All that Hannah can think of is how much she would like to rewind time to not say what she had just said, not because it's not true and not because she isn't incredibly proud to call her her girlfriend (because it so is and she so is), but because Mamrie had specifically asked to her to keep it from their subscribers for just a little while longer and Hannah had promised it.

"Hannah? Can we have a word?"

The redhead's voice sounds calm. Way too calm, if you ask Hannah. At this point she's terrified. She can't lose Mamrie. She just can't.

"Yeah, sure thing babe."

Hannah's voice isn't nearly as calm as Mamrie's. It's shaky and a little bit too high but she's glad she was able to make a sound at all. 'Don't you dare and 'babe' me right now', the look her girlfriend shoots her seems to say, as she gets up and makes her way towards the kitchen.

She quietly begs Grace to safe her, but the tall woman looks even more uncomfortable than Hannah feels, so she just follows Mamrie. She really, really, really wishes she could pass out right now, so she doesn't have to have this conversation, but she probably doesn't have to wish that hard – if her heart keeps beating this fast she might actually faint. This probably wouldn't be as bad as it is, if Hannah didn't know she fucked up, big time.

She does her best to avoid eye contact, but as soon as she closes the kitchen door behind her, she can't stop herself from looking up, searching Mamrie's face for some kind of clue of what is about to happen. But the taller woman's face is stern and absolutely not helpful at all for Hannah. So she just waits, looking on the floor again.

"What the hell was that about, Hannah?"

Mamrie's voice is still too calm. Hannah is pretty sure she'd feel better if Mamrie would scream or something. But like this? Hannah has no idea what to do. So she just shrugs and mumbles: "idontknow" really quiet and really fast.

"What did you say? And jeez, look at me, will you?"

"I said 'I don't know'", the blonde repeats a little more understandable and actually looking into Mamrie's eyes this time.

"What do you mean, you don't fucking know?", the redhead hisses. "You mean, I specifically ask you to keep it from them for now and you just blurt it out without even thinking about it? You mean, you just break the only promise I asked you for and don't even know why?"

"I didn't do it on purpose okay? And I'm sorry. Fuck, Mames, I didn't want to, it just happened and then I had already said it and now it's out there and if it was a video I would just edit it out but it isn't a video so I can't do that and I – "

Hannah stops herself from rambling. It's something she has always done when she gets nervous, but right now it's definitely not helping the situation. She takes a deep breath before speaking again.

"Do you hate me?"

It's quite a weird question, Hannah thinks. But it's the only thing she has to know, really. The only thing she cares about at the moment. Because of all the things that could happen to her, Mamrie hating her is probably the only thing she wouldn't be able to handle. Much to her surprise, Mamrie sighs as the look on her face softens a bit.

"Hannah, how on earth would I be capable of ever hating you? I mean, yeah, I'm like super pissed right now. But I could never hate you. You better get that in that pretty head of yours."

Relieved Hannah lets out the breath she has been holding in. Mamrie doesn't hate her. That's a good thing. Because if Mamrie doesn't hate her she will be able to fix this.

"Listen Mamrie, I'm sorry. Like super fucking sorry. I didn't mean to call you my girlfriend. But I don't know. It just feels so good to introduce you as my girlfriend to anybody, to let people know that I get to call the most beautiful woman on earth mine and then it kind of, sort of happened automatically and... I'm just sorry. We don't have to do anything about it. Or I'll tweet and say it was just a joke or something. I'll even make a video about it if you want me to. Anything you want, really."

The older woman even smiles a little bit now. Well, in fact it's just the slightest hint of a smile playing on her lips, but it's good enough for Hannah.

"C'mon, Hannah. They're not that thick. Besides, I like it when you call me your girlfriend, too."

"Then why..."

Hannah doesn't finish the sentence. She doesn't have to. Both women know what she means. Then why wouldn't want Mamrie to tell the whole world? Of course Hannah has asked that question before, but the older woman had somehow managed to block her and switch the topic every time.

"Because – Well, it's probably kind of different for you because you're... You're like out and stuff, but I mean I'm like... Han, I'm just scared what they gonna think about me. Which is, like, kind of stupid I guess? Because I mean, our fanbase is so supportive and everything and... Also I... We don't really know if this will work out yet, we haven't been together for that long and like, I totally hope it will because I just love you so fucking much but yeah. That's why."

The shorter woman immediately wraps her arms around Mamrie .

"Babe, it'll be alright, I promise. We'll make this right. By telling them or not telling them the truth. It'll be okay. We'll be okay. I promise."

Much to her surprise Mamrie doesn't ease into the hug but rather pushes her away a little. Hannah, who didn't expect this, looks up just to find the older woman looking at her funny. She's not entirely sure why Mamrie is, so she just stares back for a while.

"What's up, Mames?"

"You're supposed to say it back."

"Say what back?"

Of course Hannah knows by now. She knows very well. But she would also very much like Mamrie to say it again. Just because it feels super nice to have a goddess telling you that she loves you.

"You know what I mean, asshole. Don't make me say it again."

The younger woman tries to keep acting innocent but she can't quite hide her smirk.

"C'mon, babe. Just one more time. For me."

"Ugh, fine. I love you. I love you so fucking much. There, are you happy now? Now you need to say it back"

"I love you, too.", the shorter woman grins.

Finally Mamrie hugs her back. And Hannah knows, this is it. This is as good as it gets.

[A/N: This one is for @fuckamos because he is the lovely person who requested this. I tried to make it kinda fluffy. Idk. I hope you like it, dude, tell me what you think.]