Long May She Reign [Robb Stark]

xxiv

I did not know why I was pulling away from Robb, but I was.

We'd had an emotional reunion upon my return, but once I was well enough to be on my feet again, I busied myself with any task I could. Talisa advised against me staying on my feet too long, so most of my time was spend in meetings and writing letters while Robb was in the battlefield.

A moon had passed since I escaped the Lannister's captivity, and it seemed to have effected me more than I wanted it to. Frequently I'd wake up in tears, gasping and thrashing, and it'd take me a moment to remember where I was. Robb would usually wake up and hold me until I calmed down and got back to sleep, if he was in the battle camp. If not, then Brienne(who stayed in a cot in my room when Robb was away, upon my request), would wake up and help me calm down.

But even when Robb was here, I felt weak. I loved him more than anything, I'd learned that, but love for him could not mend the hole that my time kidnapped put in our relationship.

When he'd ask me what was wrong I would brush him off. I tried to see him as little as possible. I wasn't sure why- actually, maybe I was. I didn't want him to see me as weak. I'd been weak enough to get myself captured already, and keeping him at arm's length was stopping me from revealing how horrible I felt. If he knew, then it would become a real problem.

I could not afford for it to be a real problem. I was a queen, and I had a land to take care of. People who looked up to me. They needed me to be strong, so I had to be strong.

Recent events offered a welcome distraction, though. Talisa had come with us and was now staying at the battle camp. Jamie Lannister had survived, as far as I heard. Ramsay Snow and Lord Bolton were being held as prisoners, and Theon was in Talisa's care. It seemed that Ramsay had done a number on him- taken a few toes and nails, as well as tortured him. He was beyond recognition, and Robb could not kill a man that was so broken.

Catelyn and Arya were in Winterfell, and had gotten Bran and Rickon back safely. Jon was another story- he refused to abandon his post at the Wall to become Lord of Winterfell. It frustrated me, but I decided that once we took the throne, I'd be able to meet him and convince him.

The Tyrells were now openly proclaiming their allegiance to the Lannisters, and continued to evade us. They were hiding out in the capital, so we'd have to take the Kings Landing to get to them.

Right now, everything seemed to be coming to a climax. We had the Westerlands(Lannister land) completely taken over, as well as the North, the Vale of Arryn, the Riverlands, Dorne, and had begun taking over The Reach. We had control of the majority of the continent.

I observed the map, my fingers tracing over Dorne carefully. I missed my home. I ached to feel the sand between my toes and walk through the palace gardens. But alas, we had a war to win.

I stood up, my hand braced on the table to leverage myself. I had begun thinking that perhaps Jaime Lannister had been right, and I was carrying twins. I hadn't told anyone yet, though, not even Robb. Our lack of communication was making me more stressed every day.

I adjusted my dress, since it had gotten caught on the daggers strapped to my ankle. I had a weapon with me at all times, now, I even slept with them.

I should tell Talisa about my twins theory, I thought. It was better for her to be prepared for the birth, which she estimated would be in two or so moons.

I exited my tent, letting out a sigh of relief as the cool wind swept over my face. I glanced at Brienne, who gave me a small smile. She was my closest friend in this world and my sole confidant.

"Accompany me to the maester's tent?" I asked, and she nodded. We began walking, side by side. I observed the battle camp, and I couldn't help but smile. All the people here were in bright spirits, and it was uplifting to see.

"What is on your mind?" Brienne asked, glancing at me.

I looked up at her as we continued walking and smiled, shrugging.

"You're in an uncharacteristically good mood," She commented.

"Is it uncharacteristic?" I asked, and I took her silence as a yes. Perhaps my bad moods as of late had been more noticeable than I thought.

It took us longer than I would've liked to get to the maester's tent, because I could not walk as quickly as I once could. I tired easily as well now, so once we were there I paused at the opening of the tent to steady myself.

I heard voices, familiar ones, so I glanced at Brienne and held a finger over my lips.

"You need to stop telling me these things. You're married. You have a wife who loves you and who is bearing you a child," That was Talisa's voice.

"Don't you think I know that? I do. I love my wife and the child she carries, but despite what you may think, she does not love me anymore. She barely speaks to me, and I cannot take the absence of intimacy. It is wrong, I know, but my body calls for you," That was... Robb.

My fists clenched at my side, and my stomach felt like it had dropped to my toes. Brienne looked ready to kill my husband, but I held a hand up. I wanted to see where this would go.

"Sometimes I am weak, and my body calls for yours as well, but I cannot do it. I will not. Queen Elli is a friend to me, and you are wrong for doing this," I breathed a small sigh of relief that at least she was on my side.

It was silent for a moment, and then the talking got too quiet for me to hear. I peaked through the opening of the tent, and saw Robb and Talisa, chest-to-chest, staring into each other's eyes. It wasn't love, but it was certainly lust.

I wasn't sure which was worse.

I cleared my throat and the trance broke. They both looked at me in alarm, and I looked at both of them.

"My queen-" Talisa started at the same time as Robb saying my name.

I held my hand up similarly to how I'd done with Brienne just a few moments earlier, effectively silencing them. I placed both of my hands on my stomach, and Robb glanced down at them, looking more guilty than I've ever seen him.

I glanced at Brienne, "Could you please escort the king back to our tent and tell him that I'll be there in a little while? I just came to speak to Talisa about problems I was having with his child that I'm carrying."

"Are you alright?" Robb asked, concern evident in his voice. He walked forward to stand closer to me, and I side-stepped him. I looked back to my tall blonde friend.

"And try to make sure the king doesn't try and fuck anything on the way, please. You're dismissed," I waved them off.

Robb stared at me for a moment, but after Brienne began glaring at him he exited the tent. So it was just Talisa and I.

"You have to understand, I didn't-" Talisa began pleading with me.

"I know. I heard everything," I said, and I saw her shoulders drop with relief, "How long has he been bothering you?"

Talisa looked like she didn't want to answer, and I'm sure that the stern look on my face unnerved her.

"Since you've been out of the infirmary," She said. I pressed my lips together and looked away.

So roughly since I had been pushing him away. Now, that was no reason for him to try and have an affair but still, the timing was accurate.

Silence ensued as I continued my train of thought, but after a few minutes I spoke, "I think I'm having twins. Just a theory, but I think it would explain how quickly I began showing."

She began asking me questions, and I focused on my child, or children. Robb could wait until later.

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I'd like to dedicate this chapter to DaydreamsDoComeTrue , since their constructive and lovely comments helped motivate me!