Better Left Unsaid-A Kian Lawley Fanfiction

So I decided to add music for you guys to listen to while reading. I commented on some scenes ( 1 or two songs per chapter) I posted the name and artist of the song and where it plays. So I tried posting links to them but they didn't work on here so I'm sorry about that. I've done around seven chapters like this and I'm gonna keep adding more. I'm sorry but your gonna have to search the songs cause it won't let me link them.

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Chapter 1

"Oh my god this is hilarious, look!" Kian tells me as he shoves his phone in my face. It's a new vine, and it is pretty funny. Yet all I can see is his bright, toothy grin. I giggle and stare at the screen, pretending to care so deeply about the silly six second video. 

This idiot Kian Lawley; internet sensation, part of the popular collab channel commonly known as O2L, is my very best friend.

It's probably somewhere around two in the morning and we're hanging out with our friends:  Sam, Ricky, Connor, Jc, Trevor (the owners of O2L), and Andrea--que the record scratch soundbite--his girlfriend. They've been dating for a while now and unfortunately, they're pretty serious. But I guess if he's happy, so am I. Kian and I have been thick as thieves for so long, so his happiness is mine. He's trusted me with every dark secret he's ever had since we were 5, and so have I--except for maybe one.

"Carrie look at this one!" He hands me his phone again. I watch another little kid wipe out and hand him his phone back to catch him in the middle of giving Andrea a kiss. My chest tightened. He takes the phone and I watch as Andrea's smile brightens when he hugs her. Looking across the party, I desperately sought something to distract myself with. 

I catch JC discreetly covering his phone with his left hand as he types away a long message on his keyboard. Inching closer, I see he's texting someone with a few heart emojis...

"Who is it?" I inquire.

"Ah, nothing." He continues to smile at his glowing screen.

"Come on!" I grab his phone from his hands and hold it above the pool. "Grab for it and it goes for a swim!" I checked the screen and much to my surprise, saw that he was texting Kristina; one of my oldest friends. I read the most recent messages. 

"Carrie! Stop! That's private!" He pleads.

They went something along the lines of:

(Jc) "What are you doing this Saturday?"

(Kristina) "Idk why?"

(Jc) "I wanted to know if you wanted to catch a movie <3"

(Kristina) "Sure ;)"

I let out a little excited screech. "Oh my god! You like her?! Why didn't you tell me, I could've set you up!"

He grabs his phone out of my hands cautiously and frantically locks the screen.

"That's exactly why. Remember the last time you tried to set me up with someone?"

Well, he got me there. A few months ago, I tried to set him up with this girl I met who was a big fan of O2L, especially of Jc. The second she met him, she asked for a lock of his hair...

"Yeah, you're right," I laughed. "Sorry about that."

He scoffs and checks for Kristina's response like a pathetic little lap dog. I shake my head and let my eyes wander back over to Kian, only to find the happy couple sucking face by the steamy edge of the pool. I did everything I could to not yak all over their freshly power-washed deck. 

*Later That Night*

I drove back home, dropping some of the guys off along the way. Staggering into my room, more than eager for bed and still a little tipsy I started to go through my night routine. I changed into some pajamas, brushed my teeth and washed my face. When I come back into my room, I pull out my latest novel; a forbidden love story between a young upper class girl and an orphaned boy who was crashing with her family seeking shelter from WWI.  Just before the couple can finish their share of stolen glances and awkward hand touches over family dinner, I hear Kian's signature two knocks on my window and popped in my bookmark.

"Come in, Kian."

He takes a series of graceful leaps from the broken down treehouse next to my window to the sill and finally into my bedroom. He thumps to the ground with a ridiculously loud THUD. 

We'd started the knocks around the time we were around 12; 1 means 'come outside,' 2 means 'Can I come in?,' and 3 is'I need to see you, it's an emergency!' 

"I'm getting a little tall for that," he chuckled.

"You're lucky I live alone now, or else my parents would kill you for being so loud."

I lived in this house growing up and that old treehouse was once our secret oasis. We would meet inside almost every day after school to eat snacks and play games away from the control of our parents. I haven't really maintained the old thing since I moved in, and by now the wood is starting to rot. My parents moved back to New York once I wanted to live on my own and with them took all the tools I would need to fix that thing up. I should just buy some myself, but I've never gotten around to it.

Kian peels himself off of the floor and slinks onto my bed, making my silly heartbeat quicken.

"So, what are you doing here?" I ask as I toss my book into my nightstand. He crawls up to the pillow on the opposite side.

"I don't know. Just wanted to say goodnight." He reaches under his back and pulls out one of my oldest secrets; my old teddy bear.

"Daddy Bear?! You still have him?" He teases.

"Shut up," I say as I snatch it from his grasp and carefully place it next to me. He props himself up on his elbow to face me, his big puppy dog eyes begging me in a way that should be illegal.

"Why the hell did you name him that anyway?"

I shrug. "First of all, I was five. Second, my dad gave me him and well...he is a bear." He lets out a small and breathy laugh that tingles my skin.

"How's Andrea?" I ask. 

"Fine. I really like her, more than I've ever liked a girl before. Like, I've never felt anything like this, Carrie." I slowly nod and try my best not to rip off Daddy Bear's stuffing filled head.

"You okay?" He asks, a look of deep concern. Fuck, I'm cracking.

"Yeah. I'm just really tired...tonight totally drained me. We should both probably get some sleep..." I trail off so that he can take his cue to leave.

His face contorts slightly. "Actually, can I spend the night? I'm not sure I'm up for driving home and it's nearly 4..."

I nod and he motions for me to come closer, placing my head on his chest. He smelled like pine needles and cinnamon with just a dash of musk, like always. If I could bottle his scent and sell it, I so would. 

He fell asleep before I did, surprisingly. I laid awake listening to him snore and the extreme volume of my intrusive thoughts until the sun came up.