Can't Help but Love You

Self-Portrait

I stood there, not knowing what to say or even how to act.
His neon green hair seemed more vibrant than ever, his skin was pale white and his eyes looked as blue as ever.

"What's the matter, cat got your tongue?" There was such a seductiveness to his voice. He circled around me like an animal circling his prey.

"I... I didn't expect you to be here." Oddly enough I wasn't afraid, just surprised.

"Ooh, you look good enough to eat. Lucky for you, I'm not hungry." Something about what he said made my body shiver and I found myself staring into his icy blue eyes.

"Darling, didn't your parents ever tell you it's rude to stare?" He laughed his terrifyingly beautiful laugh.

"You have to go."
"I don't have to do anything. I make the rules, not you."

I knew exactly what he wanted me to say.

"Yes, sir."

This could be fun. After all, what do I have to lose.

"That's better. Now, get dressed."
"Okay."

I get my clothes and head for the bathroom to change before his hands spin me around and stop me in my tracks.

He looks at me before laughing and saying, "Where do you think you're going?"
"To change?", I say confused.

"Oh honey no, you can change right here." He opens his arms to show he wants me to change in front of him. I think about it for a second before finally deciding to do as he says.

I slip off my towel and put on each piece of clothing slowly and as seductively as I could, never breaking eye contact with him. He never took his eyes off me and his breathing got heavier and heavier.

Finally, I was fully dressed and standing in front of him.
"What now?"
He took a while to answer me before finally saying, "Now...Now, we go for a ride."

He pulls me close to him and wraps his arm around my waist before walking me out of the trailer and we walk over to his motorcycle.

"Don't you have helmets?" As soon as I say that I realize how stupid I sound. He just looks at me and laughs.

With a smirk on his face he says, "You're driving baby."
I immediately panic, "I don't know how to drive a motorcycle!"

"Today's your lucky day, I'll teach you."

We get on and we speed away. I put my hand on the bars and he puts his hands over mine. He puts his lips against my ears and tells me what to do.

I feel on top of the world, I feel the wind in my face as I close my eyes. He brought out something in me I didn't even know I had. He brought out the need to feel free, the feeling of wanting to do anything and everything just to prove I could. His touch brings me back to reality and I have the biggest smile on my face as I hear his laugh. After riding around, the sun begins to set and we come to a stop on a bridge near our hotel.

"Get off."
I do as I'm told and he quickly grabs me and turns me so that I'm facing the hectic city.

"What do you see?"
"I see a busy city, a wild and dangerous world."

He stares into my eyes and says, "It's all ours."

It's a strange thing, when I look into his eyes I don't see Jared or the Joker, I just see a man. A beautiful, terrifying man. To me, there's a bit of Jared in the Joker and a lot of Joker in Jared. They both see the world through a different perspective. They both yearn to be free and to be wild.

He grabs my hand and pulls me close, "Let's go home."
"Okay, J."

We head to the hotel and we walk into his room. We walk into his room and I'm immediately shocked at what I see.

I see myself. Right above his bed is a canvas that takes up all the wall, and it's a portrait of my face. My face is made up of shards of glass and spray paint. I'm mesmerized by the absolute beauty of it.

"Do you like it?"
"I-I love it. It's beautiful Jar-J.."
"It's you Margot, You're beautiful."

Him saying my name surprises me and I turn to look at him.

"Margot?"
"Yes, you Margot, you're beautiful and as much as I try, I can't fight it. I want you, I want to be around you, I want to talk to you and tell you about my dreams and hopes." He was no longer the Joker but he was Jared, my own personal Mr.J.

"Tell me what you're thinking.."
"I'm thinking that....We're not getting any sleep tonight."

He smiles that irresistible smile and pulls me close to him.