Divulging Remorse ✔

Chapter 13

Moutasim's parents and siblings had arrived early that morning when she was asleep, not that she would have died out of any happiness to see them if she'd been awake. She had gotten up late, her own usual routine after she finally had enough of her beauty sleep. 

Aunt Kashmala had gone all sentimental seeing her after months, hugging tightly while Riya had her hands hung on her sides, her expression dulled. She had met Ammar and Faarima very flatly as well; like you'd meet a neighbour from your old neighbourhood, emotionlessly; someone you aren't fond of anymore, yet have to be pretentious because everyone is watching but pretence wasn't anywhere near to be her forte.  

She hated blatantly, loved openly, cursed in the face and went wild, not being able to control her insanity no matter whoever stood in front of her, Agha Jaan being the exception because to his good fortune, Allah protected him from all disasters; blessings of reciting Ayat al-Kursi regularly.

Unlike Moutasim, who deliberately or unconsciously became her target,  the poor thing often fell prey to the Jinni side that Riya mostly had bustling out.

It had been three days since she last saw him, they hadn't even coincidentally come in each other's way and she was glad that she didn't have to meet him in the eye after the slapping episode. He had turned around and left without saying a word or looking back at her.

It wasn't like she had slapped him for the first time in her life to feel guilty, she hit him countlessly when they were kids and three years ago, that one strike had changed everything for the worst for him, she being mindless as ever. 

But now, she couldn't understand what exactly ate away inside of her, there was a slight regret or maybe a tinge of anxiety. Knowing, that one slap had pushed him deep inside, knocking his self-respect off in the air, crushing him down in an underworld then, though it wouldn't even be the last thing she'd ever admit to herself, weirdly, this second tight slap got her insensitive mind edgy, brooding over what further harm could he do to himself?

He hadn't been showing up on the dining table nor when they'd all gather and to her rising doubts, no one even mentioned him, perhaps they knew where he was.

As much as she wondered to herself of his whereabouts, she dare didn't ask anyone about him, no one would care less of her sudden concern for him but to her, it would set the tall tower of ego built in her self-dom, on fire, engulfing the surrounding wall of loopy hatred along with it. 

She was curled up on a couch beside Agha Jaan in his room, doodling away on her iPad, while her cousins huddled around on the bed, some were on the floor, giggling and joking along his witty remarks.

"Agha Jaan! Let's all go horse riding tomorrow?" Wisam prompted.

Ammar jumped in, "Oh yes Agha Jaan, you should ride your horse too, it's been long."

Agha Jaan rubbed his aching knees and grinned, "A horse can't ride another horse."

Radmaan who had been zooming his dinky cars up and down the bedpost, paused and gasped, "You're not a horse Agha Jaan, are you?" 

Everybody tried stifling their grins and Agha Jaan let out a short laugh, "I am, and I would have to go to the 'horse-pital' if you ride on me tomorrow."

There was a roar of laughter, giggles echoed in the room. He was big for a six-year-old, tall and bulky, his already reddened chubby cheeks flushed more, they were like two tiny balloons, always pinched by whoever could get their hands on him.

Agha Jaan was overjoyed, he sat back and let the happiness soak right into his weak bones. All his grandchildren were there except Moutasim. 

He glanced at a framed photograph kept on the mantle above the fireplace and smiled, his eyes lit up. That photograph might be strange to some but to him, it meant the world. In the photograph were him and his beloved wife, hand in hand, their backs to the camera; slightly silhouetted in the dawn. He had insisted her to take a picture with him but she had always denied as she didn't want to be captured unveiled and he didn't want her to be concealed.