Wife of Vladimir ||Book One||

Her Love of Stars

"Each day became more painful than the last. I lost more of myself with each passing moment. My temper was starting to get out of control, something I dreaded around Rosetta, and I even forgot my own name on several occasions. I could feel my old self become trapped in my sickly body. I couldn't help but wonder if this was how my father felt in his last few days.

I often paused throughout my day in complete wonder. What if today was the day? I thought of it every moment I spent alone. What if my last hours as a human were vanishing before my eyes? I was fearful that I would be alone when it happened.

Rosetta always saved me from despair when my mind wandered. She seemed to have a sixth sense of when I needed hope the most. As for that day, she was right on time. She strode into the room, carrying a bowl of soup that had steam swirling off the top and around the bowl.

'Are you hungry?' Her sweet voice filled the once silent air, quickly overpowering the voices in my head. 'I thought you might be, so I brought you some soup.'

It was always soup, but I dared not complain. It was another moment I could spend with her. I watched quietly as she sat on the edge of the bed, resting the bowl in her lap.

'Sure, but isn't that hot?' I smiled, merely happy to have her in my presence again. The voices in my head and the pain grew worse when she left. She had become the only remedy to this illness that I dreaded so much.

'Nothing I can't handle. I carried it up here from the kitchen .I'm fairly certain it won't burn me now.' Despite her confidence, she still glanced down at her hands to make sure she was alright. Once she was sure she was alright, Rosetta began to twirl the metal spoon within the contents of the bowl, mixing it all together again. More steam swirled up. This time, it reached her face. She smiled at the warm touch of it.

'Thank you.' I pulled myself up in the bed so I was sitting, though I was leaning mostly upon the headboard. The mere gesture made me wish I was sleeping as my limbs began aching from the movement. My energy had long evaporated. Even talking felt like too much sometimes.

I watched as she tilted the spoon up and dipped it within the bowl again, lifting it so that it was holding some of the liquid within it. She carefully blew on it and once the colorless steam had disappeared, she offered it towards me.

It was frustrating to be fed by my wife. I wished more than anything that I could do it myself, so that she could see her husband was strong and independent. But, I was unable. I forced myself to remember that these moments would someday soon disappear from me forever. Never again would I feel her warm touch or feel her delicate smile upon my face. I remembered each part of her face in those days that I could, knowing soon enough that the love filled in her features now would be replaced by fear and terror.

I forced myself to swallow the pride I had left for her, for this moment. It could easily be the last time I could spend with her. If I became a monster, she wouldn't care for me any longer. She'd be horrified. She would love me and I'd be like my ancient ancestor. I didn't want that. I wanted happiness with Rosetta, a life all of our own.

I wanted children with Rosetta; a family! Any man would be crazy to say he didn't at least want that with his wife, much less happiness in general. If I just hadn't gotten sick, perhaps I would have been able to enjoy these things with Rosetta.

It was hard to not think of everything I was going to miss out on. I hadn't a single clue what this upcoming change in my life would bring. I thought of the children I'd never have, given I didn't know at the time if such a thing was possible, and of all the people I'd never see afterwards.

Perhaps I would have been able to enjoy laughter while we embraced when she found out she would be expecting, or feel that strong urge to help the first time she would grow ill, or even be able to go outside and dance in the rain with her. I wanted to travel with Rosetta, to take her across the world she had once been forbidden from knowing. I had promised her so much and yet, I wouldn't be able to fulfill any of it.