Battlefield ★ Bucky Barnes

VII. Compartmentalization

Connie ran back and forth throughout the small room, tossing whatever necessities she could into her small duffel bag. Steve was gone and she wasn't sure where, but she couldn't bring herself to really care about where he had run off to. It was better for him to be gone at the moment; had he not been gone, he wouldn't allow what was happening to actually happen, and she refused to let him stop her.

The tears flowed quickly down Connie's face as she continued on. She wiped them away, but more and more followed. She'd been crying for the past twelve hours and Bucky's absence was the reason why. She couldn't even begin to describe how much pain wracked her small body; she felt so lost without him, so broken, which was why she refused to believe he was truly gone.

Connie was going to find Bucky, despite how irrational it seemed to be. She would not deny that she was, in fact, in denial. It's what made things so much harder for her—it's what drove her to make such a decision in the first place. She figured that if she wasn't able to find him as she planned to do, the extreme cold in the mountains would numb the pain she felt. A small part of her even hoped that if she was unsuccessful, nature would run its course and send her to Bucky itself.

Connie soon found herself standing in front of Bucky's chest of drawers. She was normally one to leave his belongings alone unless he gave her permission or she was doing the laundry, but now she just had the burning desire to be around anything of his that could bring her closer, bring her back.

Her lip trembled slightly as she pulled open the top drawer, and a few more tears slipped down her face. Connie reached down into the drawer and pulled out one of Bucky's shirts, hugging it close to her. She could still smell him on it, and that only made her break down even more.

Connie was sure she had stained the shirt with her tears after several moments, and so she placed the shirt back where it belonged. As she moved her hands to pick up another article of clothing, her hand hit something small. Her brows fell in confusion and she grabbed the item, removing it, as well as a small slip of paper from the drawer. Connie's breath caught in her throat as she took notice of what the item was and she removed the small piece of paper from it, holding it to her face to read the words scribbled on it in Bucky's handwriting.

You're home now, James Barnes. The war is over. Just ask the damn girl to marry you. She loves you to death. There's no way she'll say no.

Connie let out a sob as she read over the words, and she opened the small box in her hand. Inside was a ring, a very beautiful diamond ring that Connie could most certainly recall seeing before. She had been out shopping with Steve and Bucky while they were home for a few days when she first saw it, though she hadn't realized until now that she had spent so much time gazing at the piece of jewelry. Bucky must have seen just how much love she had for it and went back for it the next day, she thought.

The brunette closed the small box and placed it, and the note, back into the drawer where Bucky had originally hidden them. She wasn't sure what to feel at the moment; her emotions were overwhelming her tremendously. Bucky had planned to ask Connie to marry him after coming home from the war, and she was more than thrilled about the fact of it, but she was also brokenhearted knowing that the possibility of such was so slim at the moment.

Constance Mae refused to give up hope, though. She would do whatever it took to bring James Barnes back to her. . .whatever it took.

_____

PRESENT DAY — 2014

The old memory played over and over again in Connie's mind. It was very rare that she allowed herself to fall victim to the memories and feelings of her life in the past, but her memories of or about Bucky Barnes seemed to be a little bit harder for her to ignore. He was the single most important man in her life aside from Steve; he was the man who helped get her through her days; he was the man she loved and still loved most in the world.