Life Advice On The Line

Maturity

Maturity

• maturity - inner growth of oneself

Many times we often hear people say "act your age" or "be mature about it." But the truth is, what exactly does it mean to act your age while being mature at the same time?

You either hear people grow up too fast or too slow. Maturity is a good thing. It lets you and others know that you've overcome some chapters in your life so you are moving on to more challenges. Maturity all depends on how someone takes it. They can either use it to better themselves, to take new roads, or ...sadly some abuse maturity and take advantage of it. They use maturity as an excuse for them to think and feel that they are growing older.

For example, the media/society portrays that maturity is about being sexy, wearing more revealing clothes, drinking, smoking, having a boyfriend, having a bunch of friends, doing drugs, etc. These are some examples people misuse maturity for but are not limited to.

This is mostly directed towards young teens, young adults, and adults. Personally, I feel that being "sexy" is not the only way to be "mature." I don't know why the media believe that it is, but the truth is, being mature requires so much more than appearance and social life. It's also about responsibility. You have yourself to make the decisions that benefit and effect your life in a way that satisfy you. Now, I'm not saying that no one should have the right to feel sexy; anyone can feel sexy and confident if that's what makes them feel better about themselves. What I'm saying is that there are so many different ways to show your maturity without being sexy. Some people forget that. They all of a sudden want to grow up fast so the easiest answer to them is showing their sexuality instead. It is sad.

Sometimes we can determine maturity through someone by their outer appearance. It is true that you can tell the difference between a mature person next to someone who may not look so mature yet. Looks are greatly judged. Another thing is our attitude. How we react and respond to certain situations or to people. Having manners would be nice to have.

When I was younger, my sister always told me to be more mature. I was a cherry and carefree kid who always liked running around the house. As I was growing up, I didn't understand what she meant by "be more mature." I was confused because she would compare me to other teens my age who looked and seemed more mature than me. I wasn't one to grow up so fast like others. I guess you can call me a late bloomer. But what's wrong with being a late bloomer? I mean, doesn't everyone grow differently? Just because I wasn't into make-up or partying, it made me immature? Also, my height and weight is what a lot of people judge too. I'm short and may not grow as much meat even though I eat a lot. Everyone thinks I'm super skinny, but I'm really not. I'm just an ordinary person growing up. There are times when I felt that I was never good enough to be mature. Whatever standards maturity held, it certainly didn't make me feel any better. I was starting to think that maybe there was something wrong with the way I grew up. I didn't understand why everyone around me was growing up so fast while I just stood there trying to figure myself out. Later, I learned that it's not about how fast maturity takes you, but how you take yourself in different levels. Personally for me, maturity wasn't about putting 10 pounds of makeup on, how many boyfriends I had, how much cool clothes I had for the latest trends, or how many friends I hung out with. I felt that it was more about finding my inner true self. Despite of what everyone says about me, the only thing that mattered was how I thought about myself.

Maturity comes from different angles. It takes time for us to change ourselves inside if we want to learn to grow. Within a snap of a finger, no one's gonna change that fast. It might take months, years, life time, or however long it takes for us to grow. Maturity comes from what's really inside of us.

Since we all grow up differently, we have stages that has determines our growth. I'm not going to give you a list of "How To Be Mature" because the honest truth is, there are no list. It's not even a list. Maturity comes from how you carry yourself around others in certain situations. It's how you react when you are put into tough circumstances. It's about making decisions and choosing the choices you feel that are right for you.

Here's a fantastic quote my other sister came up with that inspired me to write this topic chapter:

"Maturity is not measured by the number of boyfriends you've had, the amount of makeup you can cake on your face, your height, your weight, the size of your wallet, all the materials you possess, and what others criticize about you, but by discovering who you are, realizing how to get there, facing all your challenges, accepting all circumstances, and actualizing yourself in the most humble, passionate, and confident way."