Hurts Instead

Part 2: THE MIDDLE

        Chapter 4

My mom often told me that I was selfish. And often I didn't believe her. But when it came to Rocky Gray, I couldn't deny it.

High School had started. Thankfully, it was different from Middle and Elementary School. People didn't hate others for no reason. Well, not as much.

You and I had changed in some ways.

I wasn't hated and had made new friends. Of course you were still my best friend.

You were still loved and popular. But now you were more of a womanizer. At least I was still your best friend. 

You had girls flying at you. I wasn't surprised. I mean, look at your tanned skin, blue eyes, and dark tousled hair. You were beautiful. A beautiful sight to me.

I was selfish and wanted you all to myself. I didn't like any of your girlfriends, and I think you knew that, even though my mouth hurled out compliments. They were all beautiful. They looked like models. Something I wasn't. At least I was still your best friend. 

They interrupted my time with you. When we were supposed to be in the woods, or midnight driving, or on the roof of your house, you were with them on a date. But at least I was still your best friend.

Then it dawned on me. I was so upset...and jealous...because I didn't just want to be your best friend. The thought scared me. I couldn't want to be more than just that, because that's simply what you wanted me to be.

But then it couldn't leave me. Every time we were together, which was always recently, I'd look at your blue eyes. They were the color of the ocean but deeper. I wanted to jump in them and swim, and never get out. Not even for a fresh of air, because they would be my air. I'd look at your plump pink lips and had the need, for mines to reach yours and kiss you senseless, became overwhelming.

Anytime our skin would touch, electricity would flow through my veins, and my heartbeat would speed up, making me come alive.

So when you found the girl who seemed to be your high school sweetheart, I had to do something. My recklessness got the best of me as I made plans to ruin your first date together. Sadly, it worked but I was seen.

We didn't talk for days. I told you I was sorry. But you were just too upset. I didn't blame you though. So I left you alone and tried to be strong. One night though I broke down. It's funny that that's the night you came. You found me sitting on the porch and had brownies in your hands. I looked up at you with tears in my eyes. 

Your handsome face showed you were sorry for me and concerned. You shouldn't have been. But you took a seat next to me and pulled me into your body, wrapping your strong arms around me. That made me cry even more because I didn't deserve you.

You repeatedly kissed my forehead, sending sparks through me, and telling me not to cry. "I'm sorry." I whispered.

"Don't be." you broght my chin up and looked into eyes. "You stopped me from making a big mistake that day."

I wiped my eyes and looked at you with a confused expression. "What? What are you talking about?"

You looked away from me, making me speak again. "What mistake?"

You finally looked at me and your  face showed me a faint expression of shyness. "Picking someone else over you." You finally revealed.

I was confused and you begun to explain. "Imani, I've had feelings for you for so long. I wouldn't tell you because I knew you only saw me as your best friend." You said in a rush.

"I'm sorry. I hope this doesn't put a hole in our relationship." You looked at me with sadness in your deep, blue ocean colored eyes.

How could you possibly think I did not feel the same? My heart has never felt more happy. It felt ready to burst with joy and happiness.

I couldn't help it. My lips reached yours in a flash. My lips molded with yours and I tasted your warm toungue and my body ignited with fire. It almost seemed impossible, as if this wasn't really happening. At that moment, I was complete.

But now thinking about it, maybe you should have made your mistake. Pick someone else over me. No, not maybe. You should have.