From The Ashes [#NaNoWriMo16]

Chapter Twenty Two - Quinton Mattos

The first thing Quin registered when he came back around was Issey standing in front of him, with her hands holding his face. She was looking up at him, half panicked and half relieved for some reason. The second thing he registered was the knife in hand, along with the people standing around him that were staring at him. Helio looked triumphant almost which was really confusing to him because everyone else looked kind of scared. He managed to drag his eyes back down to Issey, dropping the knife in his hand before realising that his lips were burning. He didn't know what was going on.

"What happened?" he murmured, out of breath. "Did I...?"

"It doesn't matter," Issey replied quickly, a smile spreading across her pink lips as she dropped her hands to his shoulders. "You're okay. Everything's okay."

As he studied her eyes, the first thing he picked up was fear. She was scared; it was slowly going away, sure, but it was still there, nonetheless. And that made him scared. What had he done?

"What just happened?" Kida demanded as she stormed over, the shadows around her picking up at her mood. "What did you do?"

"I figured out the trigger," Issey breathed, turning to face Kida proudly. Kida scoffed.

"Good timing," she muttered. "He almost killed you."

That was when it sank in, and Quin realised exactly what had happened. His heart thudded loudly in his chest as he swallowed nervously. He almost killed her. He could have easily killed her, the only person who was willing to help him. And then it would be all over.

"I- I need to go," Quin murmured, turning away from the others before they saw the look on his face. And no one stopped him. They let him go, so he just kept walking through the cover of the trees, avoiding the edges of the forest and not even bothering to keep track of where he was walking. He was alone with his thoughts now; what else was he supposed to do?

"You almost killed her," he muttered to himself, raking both of his hands through his white hair roughly and carelessly. "You could have. And you would never know."

That always made him wonder. How many people had he killed that he didn't even remember? Did they have families? Or were they all alone, just like him? He wondered if anyone had come to him seeking revenge, and how many had failed at that as well. Was he just known as a horrifying murderer that never stopped killing? Did anyone know who he really was?

He should've been glad that Issey found out what the trigger was. But it didn't. Anyone could use it against him now; they could control him. And that wasn't something he wanted to experience; his souls being torn between the same body constantly could drive him insane, and then no one could stop him. It was only a matter of time. The only way he could avoid feeling what he was feeling right then and there was if he isolated himself. Maybe when they defeated this immortal guy, Quin could take refuge on the island and hide himself away from the rest of Reichon. Even though they had another mission when they got back – killing the King – Quin couldn't take anymore risks. All it took was one small mistake, and then everything was lost. He was lost.

And there would be no getting him back once that happened.

He had managed to sleep for an hour or two on the top branch of a tall tree somewhere in the midst of the forest where he had wandered. Being alone after being surrounded by people the past few days was relaxing; it helped shed some light on his confused thoughts. He didn't know what to think about these people. The only one he had a real connection with was Issey, and he couldn't get anywhere near her without trying to kill her randomly. How long before she got scared of him too? Everyone that was ever important to him in his life had run away from him. He estimated that it wouldn't be too long until Issey did the exact same thing.