MLP Short Shories #2

Most Of The Cast Is Replaced By Inanimate Objects (Random/Comedy)

There is a point where we need to stop and we have clearly passed it. BUT LET'S KEEP GOING AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS.

Title pretty much says it all.

=The Miscellaneous of Harmony=

  An eggplant, a red apple, a marshmallow, a bag of Skittles, and a yellow feather duster with a pink handle are all set on a table. It's a set of objects that almost brings a sense of completeness and wholeness, harmony even. However, something is missing. Yes, one crucial component. These objects seem to lack joy... The sound of laughter is notably absent from their mouths, which do not exist because they are in fact an assortment of foodstuffs and one household item. They need something else to add excitement and a sense of whimsy to their lives, which aren't really things they have anyways. They need...  

 A pink hoof drops down a blue and white cup with a translucent plastic lid and plastic spoon.

They need a McDonald's McFlurry.

...

Wait, what?

"Look everypony!" Pinkie says excitedly as she stares at the items with a twitching manic smile framed by notably straight pink hair. "Flurry Heart is here to visit!"

The objects express their excitement by remaining motionless on the table.

Pinkie Pie grabs the spoon and removes it, a small dribble of melted ice cream dripping from the tip. She gasps in shock and alarm. "Oh no!" Panic grips her voice. "Somepony has consumed almost all of her life essence!" she cries as she wipes the last traces of ice cream and cookie bits from her muzzle. "Somepony find Shining Armor and Cadence, quick!"

The objects seem nonplussed by the recent developments.

"Come on, everypony!" Pinkie cries. "This is the time for action!" She stares long and hard at the objects, her eyes settling on the red apple. Pinkie Pie laughs. "You're right Applejack! Gee, your folksy wisdom sure comes in handy at times!" she says, punctuating her sentence with an eye twitch as her teeth grind against each other.

Pinkie Pie looks around the room, the fright in her expression waning slightly as she took notice of something. "Shining Armor, Cadance! Your daughter is in trouble! Some—" Pinkie's eyes darted to the side briefly "—mysterious pony has drained your daughter's essence! We have to..." Pinkie trails off and her cheeks turn red as she focuses on what she is looking at. A blue and silver shield with a trio of yellow triangles stacked into a larger triangle with a triangular hole in the middle set over a red bird emblem, a fluffy pink heart plush is set on top of this.

"Oh my g-o-s-h! Making more babies is not the answer!" Pinkie rushes forward, grabs the shield with the heart balancing on it. "Quick! You must find the culprit at once!" Pinkie flings the shield towards the nearest window, which is closed and shatters violently on contact with the heavy metal object as both shield and heart tumble outside.

'SMACK!'

"OW!" a pained, female cry from outside calls out. "Who's throwing shields?!" the voice demands. "I'll sue!"

Pinkie turns to the table full of her 'friends'. "Rarity, this is no time for fashion! A dress won't fix Flurry Heart!" she chastises. She zips up to the feather duster. "You're right, Fluttershy! We clearly need more help!" Pinkie taps at her chin thoughtfully. "We need another smart pony. A pony with a checkered past, who against all odds has risen up to save the day time and time again! A pony who's redeemed herself through the trials of friendship..." Pinkie turns to an end table next to her bed where a pile of crystals are arranged into a crude castle shape. "We need—" Pinkie thrusts her hoof into the 'castle' "—Sunset Shimmer!" Pinkie says as she pulls out an uncooked strip of bacon.