Okay, so Brendon does leave our room very early, but most likely, he is just avoiding me. I am supposed to be studying for my midterms, but how can I? I go to my first lecture of the day and scribble down six pages of notes. William gives me a confused look, but that's what you get for having pent up energy.
"No ass-pokage," he concludes.
"Fuck off," I snap.
I go to my Creative Writing class where William luckily isn't.
"Some of you have already handed in your short story assignments," Professor Jones informs us. "Now remember, that the final deadline is before the break next month!"
You'd think writing a short story would be easy for a poet. I mean, it's writing, not that different. But I am stuck with the assignment, have been for the past month.
"Fuck me," I mutter under my breath. Well, Brendon won't.
I am in a bad mood when I sulk back to the Sigma house. The only thing I can be happy about is that it's Wednesday, and I don't have to see Pete, because he is cricket hunting. When did my life become so absurd?
When I walk in, Brendon is sitting by his desk with his headphones on, deep in concentration. I've seen him do this before, and so I know he is memorising music. Brendon still hears me come in and slides the headphones around his neck as he turns in the chair to look at me.
"Hey."
"Hi," I say bluntly, not even looking at him as I go to my desk and start up my laptop. You can't just have me begging for it and then feed me bullshit about getting up early.
"I was just on my way out."
"Well, that's a surprise," I shrug, on full bitch mode.
"What does that mean?" Brendon asks.
"Nothing. Go, by all means. It's not like there's anything better to do."
"Hey, um, when I come back, we could go to Darwin Café for some smoothies or -"
"Or hey, I don't know! We could have sex!" I snap, folding my arms over my chest as I give him my best glare. "Just throwing this out there. You know, just an idea!"
Brendon sighs and stands up. "You wanna have this conversation?"
"I don't think having a conversation is going to change anything," I point out. "I was giving you the green light, for fuck's sake!"
"Okay," Brendon nods to himself. "Okay, I'm sorry about last night. I didn't mean to lead you on," he says, and I'm about to interrupt when he says, "I think we should have the sex talk now."
I snort. "What? The flowers and the bees? I think I -"
"No, the talk where I say that sex is kind of a big deal for me," Brendon says impatiently.
My mouth closes. I take a deep, surprised breath before saying. "Oh. Okay. Stage is all yours."
Brendon looks visibly uncomfortable, but if we can't talk about sex, then we probably shouldn't be having it either. But we've dry-humped, there have been handjobs and a blowjob and a lot of making out and touching, so how was I supposed to know he would have a thing about going all the way? Brendon looks a bit embarrassed as I keep my arms folded and my eyes on his face. He scratches the back of his neck and decides to look at the floor when he speaks.
"I really like you. I think you know that. I mean, yeah, I liked you in high school, but I got over it, even if I held it against you when you first joined the brotherhood. But we never even talked in high school, so obviously I've only now really gotten to know you. So what I feel for you now is something a lot... deeper than my high school crush ever was."
