Our Shot (LAMS school au)

Chapter 24: The Day After

John's POV (Tuesday (the day after the 'debate')

After Jefferson had bolted off to wherever he had gone, several people had tried to contact him. Both Burr and Madison had called him on his cell, but he didn't pick up. Luckily, Aaron had let Alex and I know afterward that Jefferson had simply gone back to his dorm that night.

He also said Thomas hadn't come out since, and he wouldn't. After he deserted his second at debate club, Washington said we would have to delay everything, perhaps indefinitely. I wasn't exactly too disappointed about that, but Alex had seemed distraught.

Ever since I had abandoned him in that bathroom, that is. He had told me that he was grateful that I had left; he didn't want to see me hurt, but if anything it seemed like Alex was the one who had gotten hurt.

Right now, my three dorm mates and I were out at a cafe after school with the three Schuyler sisters. Alex had said to me several times past that he would love to meet Eliza's two sisters, but so far he hadn't spoken a single word to anybody.

He was sitting next to me, and we were in a long booth, Alex between Eliza and I. Peggy, Laf, and Hercules were on the opposite side, and Angelica was sitting on the end in a chair. Alex was sitting next to me, our arms brushing once in a while when we reached for different things. The touch sent shivers through my skin, but he never seemed to notice.

Because he's not like you, dumb ass, I thought dejectedly, stealing a glance at Alex, who was stirring his tea, distant at ever. I nudged him. "Hey, you feeling okay?" I asked him quietly so that the others we were with wouldn't noticed.

He nodded, briefly looking up into my eyes and then going back to his tea. There was a curious look in them, but nowadays there always was, and I thought about it.

Every since yesterday, Alex didn't want to seem to want to be around me. Whenever I sat near him or started a conversation, he would find an excuse to leave. He wouldn't look me in the eye. Whenever he did, he always seemed so apprehensive.

I thought that perhaps he had done something he had regretted to Thomas; maybe said something, or perhaps he even hit him. I couldn't think of anything else that would have made Jefferson run off like that. Maybe he didn't want me to find out because he thought I would think differently of him. I wouldn't; I was in too deep now.

Alex's POV

John was next to me. We were sitting close. John's arm brushed mine as he reached for his glass.  It seemed I was hypersensitive to his touch.

I tried to busy myself by checking my phone. When I opened it, there was a cute little cloud icon appearing in the corner. When I clicked it, however, I saw the words severe weather alert; next 48 hours flash over the screen about twice before I shut my phone and shoved it back into my pocket. Just grand, I thought, exactly what I need.

John said something to me. I nodded. John started talking to Eliza, but every few seconds I felt his eyes on me; I tried my best to keep mine on my own drink.

Why can't I pull myself together? I screamed to myself. It was a combination of what happened last night that was affecting me. I wanted to tell John what happened, but if I did he would be furious with me, not to mention disappointed and hurt. What is happening to me?

Even worse, I couldn't help but think that I wouldn't mind it if Jefferson tried what he had again. Now who's the fuck boy, I asked myself sarcastically.

But did this meant that I was gay after all? Like Hercules, and John? Oh my God, John. And I was back to that subject.

For once in my life, it seemed I had a problem I couldn't solve with a paper and a pen. I didn't have enough experience, and I needed to talk to somebody who did.

Eliza.

I turned to her, sitting on my left. "Eliza," I whispered, regrettably interrupting her and John's conversation, "Can I talk to you for a minute? In private?"

She nodded in understanding. "Hey guys," she said out loud for the table to hear, "I'm going to step outside for some fresh air. Alex, you wanna come with?"

I nodded fervently, and allowed her to lead me out into the cold, evening air.