What's life? Well I'll tell you. It's pointless. All you do is grow up, go to school, graduate, go to college, graduate again, get a job and die. For me it's completely different, you have to deal with being bored all the time and wanting to die every single second of the day and it's boring. You need other things in life like friends. Which I don't have. And sex. But if you want sex you need to find someone that loves you. For me I don't believe in love. I don't believe in all that bullshit all that love crap that will soon die and never come back. It's like having a good meal, you have it you enjoy it then it's gone in a split second and you wonder where it's gone then you rethink and you killed it.
You need school too, but you will never really get it because either the teachers go to fast or the teacher is just stupid. People like to go to school because they either like school which is very rare or they want to see their friends. Again I don't have any so I don't need to go but my parents insist I go because if I don't I will die a stupid loser with no job because I didn't go school. I also need to graduate so I can leave them forever and never come back. I want to go to New York and see the lights, see Time Square and see the people walking and talking everywhere. I want to go to the roof of a building and look out and see New York from a different perspective.
I want to travel that's what I really want to do in life, get away from this boring place and go see the world. Go to a museum or concert or just get in a car and drive until you end up somewhere. The only place that I travel is to school and back, I don't like going out because I have no one to go with and going with my parents is stupid. Sometimes I like to go on the roof and look at all the cars that pass by, I always see this guy that passes by. He is either on a skateboard or just walking. He wears jeans, either black or blue and he like to wear sweaters and jean jackets. I don't really care about him but it makes me wonder what he's thinking about in his messed up little head.
They're many things that I haven't done. For instance like going somewhere with somebody and really connecting with them. Or get a tattoo, my parents would kill me but I want to be with someone that would help me not get killed. A friend, someone to travel with me. Sneak out at 1 am and go for a drive or sneak in somewhere. That sounds really nice.
Being bored sucks ass, it really does. You either think about going somewhere far or you're just sitting in your room and staring at the ceiling for hours and getting even more bored. Sometimes when I'm really bored I go into my closet and turn off the lights and play music really loud and draw on the wall. I draw in the dark and when I feel ready I turn on the light and see what I made, sometimes I leave it and other times I fix with with paint of doodle more if I want. I cover it up with an old sheet so my parents don't come in and see. They know I have it because once they actually did come in. I always tell them I have it because I punched a hole in the wall and they believe it, they don't care but I do. I care about all the little detailed drawings that nobody has ever seen but me. Not even my little sister and she likes to see cool things like weird animals or pictures that are weird looking.
My life right now is complicated, it's not a normal thing like grow up, go to school, graduate, go to college, graduate again, get a job and die. It's more like grow up, go to school, procrastinate, sleep, sleep, sleep, cry, listen to music all day and all night, graduate, go to college and be broke, draw, draw, eat, drink, drop out of school, travel. Repeat those steps about a million times then die.
So... what's life? Well I don't really know.
Authors note: Hi and welcome to my new book 'Figuring it out' I really hope you enjoy this book as much as I loved writing it. Please comment, vote, and share and chapter 2 will be coming really soon!
