The Dildo King

1

luke just came home from a long day of shopping. he had went to his favorite store of all time: spencer's. there, he bought so many new things, mostly dildos. dildos were like a collectable to luke. it became a hobby of his to buy and collect various dildos, ranging from the cheapest ones you can find to ones made out of pure gold. like didn't understand where this fascination of dildos came from, but he sure is proud of it. having this addiction makes luke feel unique to all other people.

once luke stepped inside his house, he placed his bags down on the floor in the living room. he rummaged through one of them and pulled out what he was looking for: candy dildos. luke began munch on the dildo while he took the bags and brought them into his secret room. this room is completely off limits to everyone besides himself. this is where he keeps all his dildos.

luke took each dildo out one by one and lined them up in his trophey cabinets that he bought for them. luke placed them in their respected spots. shiney ones were placed on the left side, plain ones in the middle, and long 'expert' ones off to the right. he even put them into a rainbow color order to show how gay he was.

after he finished his work, luke turned around and let out a deep sigh. he admired the separate trophey cabinet that was in the room. in there, luke put all his rare and vintage dildos. those dildos cost almost over $100 each. you can say luke has a bit of a problem.

with one last smile, luke left the room of dildos. continuing to eat the dildo candy, luke called his three best mates to see if they wanted to hang out at his house. they all glady agreed seeing as they have no life.

since the three friends live no more than five minutes away, luke sadly had to throw out his dildo candy so they wouldn't find it. if they did, he would never live the day down, especially if michael found it. luke sadly pouted at the trash can (aka me), and sat on the couch and watched the television, waiting for the three idiots to arrive.

"honey i'm home!" luke heard one of his crazy friends yell. he rolled his eyes and walked to the front door to see that his friends have already let themselves inside.

"a knock would've been nice." luke mumbled grumpily.

"aw how cute, he thinks we actually care about our manners." michael pinched luke's cheeks. luke in response swatted his hands away, causing michael to let out a screech, "that's not very nice, lukey." luke yet again rolled his eyes and left to go into the kitchen.

"hey, luke, you never told us what's inside that room." calum mentioned to luke. luke turned around and saw calum was in front of the room of dildos.

"oh it's nothing interesting." luke lied.

"so you wouldn't mind if i went inside?" calum asked, his hand hovering above the knob.

"no! don't go in there." luke yelled at him frantically.

"then what's in there?"

"it's none of your business." luke mumbled, quickly gettting aggravated.

"why won't you just tell him, you two are super close." ashton came up from behind luke, jumping into the conversation. michael was still no where to be seen, he was most likely eating pizza in his underwear somewhere (OMG THAT RHYMED).

"because, i just don't want him or anybody to know." luke said a bit too harshly.

ashton picked calum up like in the lion king and shoved his face in front of luke.

"look at him, that's the cute face of curiosity." calum continued to pout at luke.

"no, im not confessing."

"just tell us mate, it can't be that bad." calum pouted.

"just drop it."

"come on, lukey." calum looked up at him with puppy eyes.

"i said just drop it!" luke yelled. calum looked like he was about to burst into tears and ran away from him.

"luke, you know he's sensitive. you really fucked up." ashton shook his head in disappointment and ran off to calum. luke slid his back down against the door to the room of dildos and thought, "i just made my friend upset because i can't confess my addiction for dildos."
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wow....wtf did i just write. welp, i hope y'all like it.

dear lord i'm going to hell.