The sciafone

Chapter 2

I had finished my breakfast and I was ready to leave. But.. where? Where would I go to? I felt stupid, Rhysand was right. I had to know where I wanted to go to. I sighed. I stood up, washed the dishes and cleaned the table. That was the last thing I could do for them. I went upstairs to change the shirt that I wore, to my own clothes. I walked to the chamber I woke up in that morning and opened the door. I saw that all the ice was gone. Just gone. Everything, everywhere. They had clean it up in so little time..
I searched through the cabinets and the drawers, but I couldn't find my old clothes. Later on I did found something. Instead of my old clothes there were two pair of clothes in one of the drawers with a pen and a little note on it which said:

Your old clothes were too damaged to wear. If you've realized that you can't go anywhere else than here, choose pair of clothes number 1. If you're still as stubborn as before, and you think that you can still return to the Winter court, choose pair of clothes number 2. If you want to talk to me, write on the paper. And you could always come to me if you want me to show you around in the camp. The chamber is now yours if you stay here, but please don't turn it into an ice palace again.
Rhysand,

I sighed. He knew.
I took the pen and wrote:

I didn't do it on purpose. I've never learned to control my powers. I'm a healer. Not a fighter.

I waited until the paper disappeared and later returned.

Do you want to change something about that? I could always train you if you want to. Or are you going to leave and die instead?

I growled and returned the note with:

I stay. You were right, I don't have another place to go to.

This time it took longer before the note returned.

Good. Do you want me to show you around the camp? We could already start training if you want to.

Training? Do I even want to train..
Everyone has to be able to control their powers. I'll stay here for probably a long time. In that time I can't keep myself in the house forever. So training it is..

That would be a pleasure.

The note disappeared and I put the first pair of clothes on. It felt weird. I've never worn such clothes before. Fighter clothes. Illyrian clothes. The note didn't return. But after I was done with my clothes, someone knocked on my door. I opened the door and I saw Rhysand standing in front of me, also, with Illyrian clothes on. I took a deep breath, "Let's go then," I said. He nodded and he led me to the hallway. I smiled and started to walk.
Outside, there were already many people training. There were people that trained tough and acted like they would die if they didn't win this training. And there were people that trained more soften. I looked around and the only thing I saw was: man. Man Fae. There was no woman anywhere to be seen. My question felt stupid but I didn't care; "Where are all the women?," I asked.
He looked at me and said; "They are working, they're not allowed to train or fight."
"Why not? Why do they have to work? Don't they need to be able to fight for themselves?"
"Yes," he said while looking away. "They do, but since I'm not the one that rules the camp, I can't change anything about it.... Even though I would pretty much like to change that."
I smiled sadly at him and we walked through the crowded place of training Fae.
As we walked further and further, I felt many man that were training, staring at me. I felt uncomfortable and I walked a bit closer to Rhysand. He must have seen that, because he said: "Don't mind those people, they usually never see women here in the camp. The women work 24 hours long and they usually clean. They don't have time to walk around like this in the camp."
"And it's even more unusual when they see someone from the Winter court walking around here," he added.
I smiled sheepishly as we walked further. "Where are you actually bringing me to?" I asked.
"Not where but to who. I'm bringing you to my friend Cassian. He's a trainer in this camp, he'll let you control your powers and he'll learn you to fight."
Cassian? The guy I met in the morning? He didn't even bothered to tell me his name.
"May I ask you who Azriel is?" I asked.
He grinned and as we walked further, he pointed with his forefinger to a tall guy, again, with wings and short dark hair. He also had hazel eyes just like the guy I had met this morning. He had shadows all around himself and he was currently the one training. He was fast and smooth, and just in a few seconds he already had the guy he was training with, on the ground. Cassian walked over to Azriel, who wasn't even sweating a little bit, and patted him on his back.
"Good work Az," he said.
Azriel nodded at him and walked away to get himself some water.
Cassian started to talk with the guy who was thrown to the ground by Azriel about his techniques and helped him off the ground. I couldn't believe that I had to fight with someone like Azriel.
"You don't have to fight with someone like Az, he's a professional. We will start easy on you," Rhysand said to me just like he could read my thoughts.
I swallowed and the coldness in my veins that was silent for a few hours came back again. I did my hands in the pockets of my pants to warm them, to control them but it didn't work. The coldness pushed further and further to be released. I started to feel nauseous and I stepped back. A painful feeling shuttered through my body and I grabbed my chest. Rhysand and a few people around us saw it.
"Are you okay? What's wrong?" Rhysand asked.
I wanted to answer but my mouth was frozen and I couldn't get a word over my lips.
I closed my eyes to control and calm the pain, but it only got worse. When I closed my eyes I saw a room. The room where Amarantha had tortured my mother. I started to get problems with breathing, I lost my balance and fell on the ground. The ground hit me like thousands of knives in my back and I screamed it out. I had to get away with this memory but I couldn't. I tried to open my eyes, but they were frozen as well as my mouth, feet and other the rest of my body. I was paralyzed. I heard people shouting my name and trying to make me wake up. But all of that was for nothing because all the sounds and movements of the outside world stopped and disappeared. The only thing I could see was the room of Amarantha. A person appeared on my right side. The person had chains on their arms, neck and feet. The person had blood everywhere and had a lot of wounds. Deep wounds. I tried to get to the person but I was paralyzed. Even in my own imagination, or whatever this was. Tears started streaming down my face and I tried to speak,shout or scream. It was no one more than my own sister. Elenthia.
The person knelt on the ground and a person on the left side of me appeared as well. My heart dropped. Amarantha.  Amarantha laughed and started talking to my sister. I couldn't hear her. My sister just knelt in front of her, with a pale face. No emotions, nothing. I wanted to shout that she shouldn't let Amarantha kill her, or do anything else. But I couldn't. Amarantha stepped closer and then suddenly something appeared through my body. Another.. feeling. A strange feeling, a feeling I've never felt before in my entire life. The feeling wanted to be released and I didn't even tried to stop it. I thought that something would happen, but nothing did. Amarantha took a knife out of nowhere and held it as close by my sisters neck as she could. Blood appeared on the wound that Amarantha had made. And I tried to fight back to the power that had paralyzed me. Amarantha smiled. Pathetic. Pathetic monster that she was. My sister didn't fight back when Amarantha shove the knife deeper into her neck. I tried to scream and scream. My sisters face didn't move and she didn't try to fight back.

Fight back! Fight back, goddamnit! 

This time, I did hear what Amarantha said: "Pity for a young lady like you to die."
"You are a murderer. A cold hearted murder. I am happy that at least I got someone that cared about me." She said. "I got something worth dying for. And that's my sister."
And with that my sister pushed as hard and as fast as she could to the knife and ended her own life.
My heart broke. It broke. She was the only one who I cared about. The only person I wanted to live for, and die for. The memory faded away and I wasn't paralyzed anymore. I opened my eyes. I was still on the ground and the whole camp was standing fifteen meters away from me. They looked shocked and by some I could see that they were even scared. I looked around me and I saw the cause why they were afraid of me. I had frozen the whole pad around me. Fifteen meters all around me. And that wasn't the only thing. Darkness fell on the ground that I had frozen. Darkness was under and above the ice. Nothing but darkness.

The night- and winter court.

I had used my mothers powers for the first time. That was from the feeling I had during the memory.

During the death scene of my sister.

On that moment I realized that I really couldn't control my powers. And maybe, even maybe I was starting to get more powerful.
I saw Cassian, Rhysand and Azriel standing at the side looking at me. Everyone was just looking at me. Like I just came out of the sky. I realized that they were looking at me. Not the creation that I had shown and made. But at me. I stood up. And on that moment I realized why they were looking at me like that. I suddenly felt too heavy. I looked behind me. And I saw that wings had appeared, not only wings but also shadows had appeared. Shadows and wings. I felt cold and I was scared. Still many thoughts ran through my head. I felt dizzy and I felt that they weren't clearly my thoughts.

How did this happen? Why did this happen?

I looked at Rhysand and the only thing I could get over my lips were: "Help me."