Soul Stories

Hazel

This is the story of Hazel. They have chosen to use this name and remain semi-anonymous, please respect that. Thanks.

I am dumb. I'm not beautiful. Everyday I look in the mirror I see a mistake. Every day I wish I could die. I have amazing friends, not a lot but enough for me. I dream to change the world,  but I don't focus on changing myself.

I'll start when this all happened. First my parents slit up when I was a young child. As I lived a life of a fairy tale reality hit me like a meteor. I soon found out they found others, who I would never call my own parents. I started comparing myself and physically abusing myself for my flaws but I knew my parents would find out.

There is always some better than me. They have everything, but what do I have?

Nothing, not beauty nor smarts. They think I am happy but I am so depressing it could kill me. Literately.

I went to a confidence class after as I went through years of bullying. It did help, but then I forgot most of it. I came out later twice as depressed as I was before. I don't love because my parents don't love. I was a child then, so impressionable. That was where my depression sprouted, then came talented people. They were talented at everything, didn't have to try, while I struggled to get a B. I'm hated by most people. My story, sometimes I wish I could make it end.

But here I am, living long, singing a somber song. No one knows, it's better for them to not know who I am. They say let your inside be out.  I don't do that, I am a polar opposite in the inside. They worry about me but I tell them I tell them I'm fine when I wish I had a knife so I could kill myself.

I struggle with suicidal thoughts on a daily basis. A life without love. Hateful stares sent my way. Don't worry, it's everyday.

This is my life. Just waiting for me to end it.

💬ReadWriteInspiration💬
Oh my goldfish. That's crazy. A few things:

1-Don't ever kill yourself. People care about you. I care, even if you feel like nobody else does.

2-Be honest and get your feelings out to someone, just vent.

3-Our "flaws" make us unique and individual. If nobody had any flaws, what would the world look like?

Lastly, be yourself, be unique.