Hetalia: Crackish Oneshots

Installing my love (PrCan)

"Fucking finally!" The albino groaned, looking at the ornate shelf he just installed to the main floors bathroom.

Looking at the mess he had made from the shavings of the wall, it had taken him longer than he wanted to admit to put the shelf in. It wasn't the fact that he didn't know what he was doing. It was the opposite in fact. He wanted the shelf to be perfectly level with the wall and the fact that the shelf was an antique of his boyfriends. He wanted to make sure he didn't damage the object and risk sleeping​ on the couch.

Prussia shuffled out of the bathroom into the kitchen pouring himself a glass of water. Almost spiting out his drink after taking a quick glance into the living room. There lay his Canadian boyfriend with his entire torso completely down touching the yoga mat beneath him while doing the splits. A light line of sweat leaking through the white tank were his spine lay. Moving his torso upright still doing the splits, leaning over to his right leg touching his hand to his foot with ease. As Prussia just gapes at his lovers stretching ability. Not realizing he was so flexible untill now since he was primarily the reciver not the giver.

Canada spoting his lover in a daze still in his position questioning. "What?"

"Jou know we should totally bring your yoga thing in our room~" The albino seductively purred. Trying to look as suductive as he could muster on the spot which wasn't too terribly different than how he normally appeared.

Canada immediately got up from his spot wipeing off the sweat on his face with his semi damp tank top allowing his lover to get a quick look at his muscles as he walked into the kitchen. Looking down at Prussia what had an tinge of excitement in his eyes.

Canada grabbed one of his hands kissing the top of it causing the other male to blush slightly as he whispered in his ear. "Do you know what I want you to do with these hand's?"

"Anything my birdie wants." His lover responded tightening his grip on the Canadians large hand.

Canada smirked grabbing his jaw with his other hand bending down eye level with him. The Prussian let him do as he please feeling a slight twinge in his stomach.

"Good~" the Canadan purred.

His expression suddenly changing to serious as he let go of his boyfriend leaving him confused as he firmly states. "Do the laundry Prussia. You've been slacking like all month on laundry duty and I'm slightly disappointed in you."

"But-" Prussia attempted to defend himself only to be cut off by a finger on his mouth getting saliva on the index finger a buzz emitting from Canda's smart watch as he looks down at the lit up screen.

"Sweet Maple, there's a huge blizzard hitting us tonight were gonna be snowed in for a few days! I gotta go to Walmart and get some fabric softener and lube!" Canada justified stripping off his tank top wipeing the sweat off his torso walking into the laundry room opening up the dryer fishing out a shirt with Prussia trailing behind him.

"But birdie! What about our sexy yoga thing we pretty much agreed to?" The albino wined as Canada pulled on a black tee with a pocket that had a bleach stain on the bottom hem. Striping off his pants chunking them into the washer, picking at the bleach stain.

"Sex or bread Prussia? Which one is more important? And do you see this on my shirt this is why I said you need to help more with laundry. I can't do it all by myself, eh?"

"Vell,... there both very important parts of an good relationship!" The Prussian boasted as Canada threw on a pair of jeans and mismatched socks. Walking out of the laundry room into the kitchen drinking some of the abandoned glass of water on the counter.

"Are you coming or not because I'm not 'bout to get stuck in traffic. And we still have a ton of laundry to do." Canada questions as he shoved his wallet in his pocket, sitting down to tie his shoes.

Before Prussia could even form an answer Canada snapped his fingers. "I'm go to wallmart to get the stuff real quick and you can stay home and do the laundry!"

Quickly planting a kiss on his lovers lips preventing him to speak opening up the door the winter air spilling into the living room. " Je t'aime! I'll be back soon!"

Slamming the door behind him leaving Prussia standing there, the sound of the vehicle leaving the drive way echoing throughout the house as he mutters. "Why do I have to do the laundry? Jou said we should do it together but noo. Do I look like a maid? Nein I'm not. But meybe zhat's what my birdie wants. I bet mein thighs would look great in a sexy maid dress. I should invest in a slutty little maid outfit zhen do what birdie wants. Ja zhat's basically vat Italy does for West and zhey seem sexually active und happy."

The albino slowly walked up the stairs maid fantasy's forming in his mind while gathering all of the dirty laundry. Then proceeding to chunk them over the stair banister near the beginning of the stairs then shoveling them into the hamper like an disgustingly obese person would do to a donut. He started the first of the many loads of laundry he would have to do that day.

Distracting himself in-between loads a by sypeing his two best friends, who just ended up talking about the tattoo on England's ass and how they sware he got it touched up a different shade of red while Prussia folded chothes; as the albino interfered the bickering saying that red is red there is no difference earning a gasp from France. Telling Prussia he should know what the difference between shades of red by now, dramatically ending the call only to call back 15 min later with a large pizza and a bottle of wine.

Eventually the trio stopped talking. Prussia finishing folding up the last bit of laundry saddened to see that they own no form of sexy maid outfit, but an unsettling amount of sexy banana hammocks and matching tops.

The albino groaned faceplanting onto the bed. "Zhe awesome me did all the laundry and didn't even go into a state of denial. I'm so awesome." Craming his arm underneath his theigh to grab his phone out of his pocket setting the device near his head.

His white cat appearing out of nowhere crawling ontop of his shoulders slightly grazing Prussia with his claws as he adjusts himself in the middle of his back kneeding at the area repetitively. Prussia slightly shaked his back the cat not moving from its position. "Go avay kitty, I smell like gain, wood shavings and depression."

Prussia groaned rolling over on one side the cat sliding down unwillingly mewing slightly as the albino sits up. "Vere is your buddy, Purrsai? Is he hiding in the shower and going to scary the scheisse out of me?" He extended his hand out to pet the creature when suddenly the cat hissed lightly chomping on his master's finger causing blood to draw as he pads off into the home not giving any fucks.

"Fuck! I thought ve vere friends!" Prussia shouted walking into the bathroom clutching his finger in his hand trying not to trail blood anywhere, turning on the water rinsing out the decent bite mark he received looking at it as the water downed blood entered down the drain assuming that it would take atlest a day for it to completely heal half for it to scab over since he technically was a nation and is a small part of Canada.

And on that fateful day Prussia learned that cats are like extrondinarly hormonal women, you never know what they'll do. Same for Canada who showed up a short while later with the goods he had purchased after codeling Prussia allowed him to dominate him while in a funky yoga position that would kill any regular person and probably end our lives at that exact moment. But what of the cat, Purrsai who was being a little shit? Nothing because thoes cats that lived in that house were Canada's baby's and treated him like the maple scented goddess we all know he is.