Rumors of War || The First Avenger

Chapter Thirty-Two: 'Til Death

Picture is Tatiana Maslany as Emma Jane Barnes.

Music is "Someone To Watch Over Me" by Ella Fitzgerald.

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CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO: 'Til Death

{August 18, 1944 - Two Weeks Later}

Poland is much colder than Greece; that's the first thing I repeat to myself every morning as I wake up. I stretch, shaking the frost from my uniform as I put it on. A warm, winter coat is needed on days like today to add an extra layer of protection from the weather.

I tug my Sherlock Holmes short-story, The Final Problem, from the corner of my tent. It's part of a collection of Sherlock Holmes stories called The Memoirs of Sherlock Holmes and was a gift from my mother on my last birthday before she died. I open it to my favorite chapter, the chapter where Sherlock and Moriarty are fighting on the edge of Reichenbach Falls. It's always been my favorite, yet the one that causes me the most pain.

When I get to the page, a piece of paper falls into my lap. A lump forms in my throat as I recognize the sloppy handwriting and familiar sight. Bucky used to do this all the time in my college days, leaving notes in my textbooks to cheer me up. I hold it up, reading, "I miss you, Doll. I'm here whenever you need me. Your Bucky, August 12th, 1944."

It's been two weeks since I found out about my condition, two weeks since I've been able to sleep, and two weeks since I've had a full conversation with Bucky. I've been avoiding everyone I care about--Steve, Rose, Peggy, the Commandos--but him most of all. How can I tell him that his wife won't grow old with him? Who would want that? In my mind, I'm putting off the inevitable.

I step outside the tent, seeing Dum Dum and Jim warming their hands by the fire. We set up camp outside Poznan late last night, so it's understandable that everyone is rubbing their eyes in exhaustion. No one seems to be in the best mood, and the two Commandos are bickering even more than usual this morning. This time it's about American baseball teams.

"I don't care what you say, Fresno," Dum Dum groans. "The Oakland A's got nothin' on the St. Louis Browns, and you know it."

Jim rolls his eyes. "In your dreams, Dum-Ass. I think Poland is freezing what's left of your brain."

Dum Dum laughs synically, stroking his mustach. "I think you're in denial. When we get home, I'm gonna take you to a game and you're gonna cry like a baby as your team loses to mine."

Jim shouts, "Ha! Now you're the one in damn denial. You wanna fight about it? Let's fight!" Jim stands, holding up fists like a boxer.

Dum Dum rolls his eyes, remaining on his crouched position and warming his hands by the fire. "I'm over six feet tall and two-hundred pounds. You're, what, five-foot-five-inches and one-fifty? I'd squash you like a bug, Fresno."

I walk over to them, sitting on one of the logs they'd pushed up next to the fire. I put my hands just outside the flame, enjoying the warmth on the early, August morning. "Good morning."

Dum Dum glances over to me with a tinge of worry in his blue eyes. "Mornin'. How'd you sleep, little lady?"

I shrug. "Did any of us sleep well last night?"

"Oh, yeah, I sure as hell did!" Jim shouts, standing. "All three hours of it. I don't know about you guys, but I'm starving. I'm going to get whatever glop they have for breakfast today. Anyone coming with?"

I shake my head, and Dum Dum does the same. "Go on without us, Fresno. We'll catch up later."

After Jim is out of range, I spot Steve and Bucky headed in the same direction. Bucky looks over towards me with a confused look. Confused and sad. Steve pats him on the back, guiding him towards the make-shift mess hall where we can smell some form of breakfast food being prepared.