Chapter 13 - After Awareness

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"I have something to confess."

"What is it so suddenly, Redhead?" He Tian asked worried.

"I remember everything." Guan Shan said bluntly. "When I spent the night here. I've never blacked out. I remember everything."

"Are you talking about what I think you are talking about?"

"I was drunk, but I was aware. I knew what I was saying and doing." He sighed. "I just couldn't control it."

"Why did you pretend you've forgotten, then?" He Tian grabbed both of Guan Shan shoulders.

"..." Redhead shrugged.

"Don't tell me..." He shook his head. "I'm going to ask you a thing you've asked me before. I want you to be honest with me, Guan Shan."

"What?"

"Do you regret it?"

"..." A lump formed inside Redhead's throat. He couldn't say a word.

"Do. You. Regret. It?" He Tian repeated, slowly.

"..." Guan Shan diverted from He Tian's gaze, looking to the ground below.

"Get out." He whispered, receiving a confused look from Guan Shan. "GET OUT!" He shouted, making Redhead jump in surprise.

Guan Shan gathered all his things and walked to the door, turning the doorknob and opening it. His grip on the knob grew stronger as he shook his head and thumped his feet on the ground. He was waiting for someone to interrupt him. He was waiting for someone to call him and don't let him go. But this call never came.

He slammed the door shut and took off his shoes, entering the apartment once more.

"I am not leaving." He stopped in front of He Tian.

"It was an order, Mo Guan Shan." Twenty-first... No, it wasn't the same tone. This one was not seductive, it was threatening.

"I don't care. I'm not your fucking bitch for you to order me around. You can command me to cook, to clean, because you pay me for it, but when we are facing each other as equals, as friends, you can't do that."

He Tian, that wasn't looking to Guan Shan, widened his eyes. He had never thought the smaller guy would say such things so frankly to him.

"Now we are friends?" He said mockingly, and Redhead could sense he was hurt deep down.

"I can't say things properly when I'm being cornered, He Tian." He grabbed the black haired boy's collar. "Look at me when I'm talking to you, damn."

And then He Tian looked.

-----

Guan Shan remembered everything. He was testing He Tian. He needed to know if he could trust the other guy blindly, and that was his answer. He could. Redhead's head was a total chaos. He inner punched himself over and over. Guan Shan couldn't believe he got drunk so fast, or that he actually enjoyed the kiss. But the thing that pissed him off the most, was the fact that he was completely aware that he was attracted to He Tian.

And he didn't hate it.

-----

What happened after was something the black haired boy wasn't expecting even in his wildest dreams. Redhead, with that grumpy expression of his, not only pulled He Tian closer, but also locked their lips together. Mo Guan Shan was kissing He Tian. Out of his own will.

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