While We're Young (Marianas Trench)

Chapter 6

Every day for the past two weeks Josh has been texting me random questions:

What's your favourite colour?

Winter or summer?

What's your favourite animal?

Do you like cheese?

Who's your favourite celebrity? (it better be me . . .)

What flavour of toothpaste do you use?

What's your biggest fear?

What's the weirdest dream you've ever had?

I've answered each question as best I can, still being careful about what I say. From every question I answer, comes three more until I have to put down my phone for a minute and let my brain untangle itself.

What does your house look like? ~ A

If you want to come over, all you have to do is ask :p ~ J

I can hear his laugh in my ears as I read the text. I can't believe how quickly I seem to be falling for him. I'm usually so guarded, never letting anyone in, but Josh is somehow breaking down that wall.

Come get me? ~ A

*****

"There's not much to say, but it's my home." Josh smiles, walking me around his penthouse. It's a typical one-bedroom, with a little more space and way nicer furniture than my own.

I wander towards a staircase and point in confusion. "What's this?"

"The roof. You wanna see?" He asks, leading me up the stairs onto a beautiful rooftop patio. "I almost bought a tiny horse to live up here. I got really drunk on tequila one morning and decided that that would be a great idea. You know what I found out? They're too fucking stupid to use the goddamn stairs!"

"For real?" I ask, referring to the fact that he almost bought a horse on impulse. That shows slight signs of, well, being crazy.

"I know! How was I supposed to take care of a horse if it couldn't climb the stairs?" I laugh and shake my head, grateful that he never actually bought it.

"Why did you almost buy a horse, Josh?" It strikes me as an odd thing to buy, even when drunk on tequila.

"I was about to get married, but she broke it off really close to the wedding. I thought we were in love, so maybe an animal might bring us together more? I dunno, it was a stupid drunken decision."

"You were engaged?" He never told me this. I mean, yes it's only been three weeks, but it's still an important thing that one would think would come up in an earlier conversation.

"To a gorgeous woman, but obviously she wasn't interested . . . Besides, now I have you. You're much better than her, and a tiny horse." He smiles, gently brushing his lips on my temple. "I think I might have a thing for blondes,"

I laugh, twirling a strand of his hair. "I think you just like the colour in general, hun."

"I think you're right, beautiful."

*****

I've never enjoyed compliments, but when they come from Josh they make my heart soar. But ever since he called me beautiful on the roof of his apartment, I can't stop thinking about the fact that he called another woman 'gorgeous'.

I mean, sure I know he's had other girlfriends in the past, that's a given, but he was almost married! If his fiancee hadn't called off the wedding last minute, he would be married! The thought of someone turning down a sweet, funny, adorable man like Josh makes me mad. Did she not think that it would hurt him? Is that why she did it? There's only one way to find out.

Without Josh or Libbey's help, I manage to figure out who the lady is and find her address. I show up on her doorstep five minutes later and ring the doorbell. The door swings open to a tall blonde in a swimsuit. "Who are you?" She snarls.

"Alexis," I say with a cool smile. "Are you Amanda, Josh's ex?" She rolls her eyes as if she's been through this before.

"Alright, look. You hardcore fans need to back out of our personal lives and get your own fucking life." As she closes the door, I stick out my hand to stop it, instinctively.

"I'm not a 'hardcore fan', whatever the hell that is, I'm his new girlfriend." The door flies back open. Amanda eyes me up and down, aggravated.

"You're just a young little one, he'll toss you aside like a mouldy sandwich." She smirks, leaning on the doorframe. "Where'd you even meet him? At one of his concerts?"

"Yes, but—"

"You're so full of shit, Josh doesn't date fans." She snickers at my struggle with words.

"I told you, I'm not—I wasn't—a fan. I was there with my friend and got her a VIP pass for her birthday, but she had to go home, so I used it. I wanted to grab a personally signed t-shirt and get out of there, but as soon as Josh saw me I was cornered. He wanted to prove he isn't an ass, so he wrote down his number . . . On my arm." I glare at her, and she snorts.

"So why are you here?" She asks. I lift my chin forward and push my shoulders back.

"Why did you lead him on and break his heart at the very last minute?" At this, I'm dragged inside Amanda's house by the arm.

"Sit down, sweetheart, there's a lot you don't know." The smile on her face is so eerie and disheartening that I fall onto her plush couch right away. "How long have you two been going out?"

"Almost a month," I mentally count the weeks, it's been three and a half.

"Josh is bound to get sick any time now, then. You'll take him to the hospital and they won't tell you anything. You'll sit in the waiting room for a week straight, no clean clothes and tears streaming down your face. Then, as soon as you go home, you worry that he won't come home. You'll be alone and you won't know what to do. You cry some more. And, finally, he'll come home after a month, two months, sometimes three. He'll be a bit week, but Josh, all the same."

"So, you left him because he was sick? That's when he needed you the most!" I yell. Amanda looks taken aback, unsure of what to say.

"I was tired. I was so, so, so tired. And worried! I couldn't deal with the stress it added to my life." There are tears forming in her eyes now, and I should feel sorry for her. But I don't.

"Oh yeah, because being a model really has a lot of stress to it. Stand here, look pretty, stay thin . . . Okay, stay thin is one thing, but if you have a high metabolism, you have nothing to worry about. What now? Are you banging some pro football star? No labels, just—"

There's a knock on the door that startles me out of what I am about to say. Amanda turns and stalks away towards it. "Oh thank god!" I hear her sigh. "She's in the living room." Who's here? Did she call the police? A hitman?

I see Josh round the corner, he looks relieved to see me, but also agitated. "I thought I might find you here," he hides his irritation with a smile, and to spite Amanda, I plant a kiss on his lips.

"I had to know why she left you," I reply, twitching my lip in embarrassment.

"Well, what did you find out?" Josh asks nervously. Is he afraid that I'll leave him too?

"She's a bitch for leaving you because you were sick all the time. That's not something you can control," I glare at Amanda and take Josh's hand. "I'm not going anywhere until you do something too stupid to forgive."

"I'm glad!" Amanda says in fake delight. "Now get out of my fucking house and never come back." She practically pushes us out the door and off her porch, closing the door in a huff.

"You could have come talked to me," Josh says, letting go of my hand. I touch his pain-ridden face and he leans away. "I'm serious Alexis, I want to know I can trust you."

"Joshua . . . What's your middle name?" Josh cracks a half-smile and shakes his head.

"Keeler," really? Keeler? That's . . . Original.

"Joshua Keeler Ramsay, you can trust me. You can trust me until the sun expands and consumes the earth. I never wanted to hurt you, and I never want to hurt you again." If I never have to see him frown again, I'll try every day for the rest of my life.