This Boy - Mclennon

Chapter 26: Hold Me Tight

A/N: i feel like this is kind of a filler and im sorry, i hope you still enjoy it

~Paul's~

I woke up by myself. John wasn't lying beside me in my small childhood bed. As I walked down to the kitchen, I noticed that Mike was gone to school and Auntie Gin must have been out. I turned on the kettle and began to make breakfast, when I noticed a note on the table.

My love,

I've gone to Mimi's. I figure I should see her, since we've been home for a few days now. I know you may not want to call, but I left the phone number for the lawyer on the fridge.

Ring me when you wake up. You probably won't be up anytime soon, but I love love love you Paul.

J.L.

I smiled as I read the note. I sat down with my tea and looked down briefly at the newspaper that had been left open. John was right about me sleeping in, I glanced at the clock on the wall and it was 2 o'clock pm.I thought about when John and I would be able to have our own house, with our own kitchen and our own tea. I smiled again, at the thought of a normal life with John. I knew it wasn't completely possible, though. People would notice when two men lived together for years and never had girlfriends. They'd definitely notice when two men adopted a child. I wanted a child, eventually. I couldn't see myself having a child with anybody except John, though. 

The small piece of paper with the lawyer's phone number on it caught my eye. I stared at it for a few moments before snatching it off the fridge. M. Edison, Attorney of Law. I poured some more tea and kept the phone number in my hand. John was right, I didn't want to call. It was going to be a lot of stress and it was going to bring back a lot of hard memories. But I knew it was going to put Jim away. Where he couldn't get anywhere close to Mike or John. Soon enough, I found myself dialling the number.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Edison's office?" A young lady's voice said from the other end of the line. "Uh, hi, my name is Paul McCartney and I'm uh, calling for Mr. Edison?" I said, my voice sounding obviously shaky and nervous. "Ah yes! Mr. McCartney, thank you for calling. Mr. Edison has been expecting your call. Hold on, I will retrieve him for you." The young lady's voice became even higher with excitement. "T-thank you." I tried to remain calm. I sipped on my tea and waited not-so-patiently. "Mr. McCartney!" A man's voice said on the other line. I jumped, spilling a little bit of my tea down my chin and onto my t-shirt. I cleaned it up quickly as if I thought this guy was going to see me. "Hello, sir." I finally said. "I'm glad to hear from you. When can we make an appointment?" Mr. Edison asked. "Uh," I tried to think. "How about Friday afternoon? Gives me some time to prepare, and you some time to gather your information. I am still waiting to hear from Mr. Lennon, though." Mr. Edison suggested. I smiled at the thought of someone calling John "Mr. Lennon". I nodded, once again thinking he could see me. Sometimes my anxiety made me act in the strangest ways. "Friday is good. Actually, Mr. Edison, I can bring John Lennon with me. He's a very close mate of mine." I told him, hearing the front door open and close.

"That would be lovely, Mr. McCartney." I tried to peer around the corner to see who came in the door. I pulled to far and felt the telephone shift off the counter. I jumped back to catch it, successfully. "We will see you on Friday, sir." I said as I hung up the phone. "Hello?" I called as I slowly walked toward the hall. I felt two hands on my hips from behind grab me quickly. "Ah!" I yelped and turned around to find John standing there with a large grin on his face. I smacked his chest and shook my head. "Bloody hell, Lennon. Ye scared me right out me skin." I clenched my chest, breathing heavily but laughing because of how proud of himself John was. "Yer eyes nearly pooped out of yer head!" John was still giggling uncontrollably. "Bugger off!" I shoved him and made my way back into the kitchen to my tea, which was now cold. I turned the kettle on again. "Tea, love?" I asked John. John hummed and nodded as he came up behind me again, kissing my neck. "Mimi wants t'see ye for dinner tonight m'love." John mumbled against my neck, shooting tingles down my neck and spine. I raised an eyebrow as I spun around, pushing through him to pour our tea. "Is that so?" I asked, sounding surprised.

"Don't get too excited m'love. I told 'er about Jim. I told 'er everything." John said as he sat down with a concerned look on his face. My eyes widened. "Everything?!" I asked, sounding irritated. "I had to, love. I left early this mornin' cause I had a bit of a break down. It was stupid. But anyroad, I went home to Mimi and she asked what was wrong. I started wailin' like a little school girl," John chuckled as he spoke, "And I just told her everything." John stopped chuckling by the end. "Are ye okay now?" I asked as I poured some milk in his tea and handed him a spoon. "Ye, I am. She's a wreck though. Feels terrible 'bout you and Mike." John told me as he took my hand on the table, examining it as though he'd never seen it before. I smiled at him. "I called the lawyer." I blurted out. John nearly choked on his tea. "Really?" He asked. "We've got to go see him on Friday.." I added. John nodded and smiled into his tea. "I'm proud of you." John said quietly as he set the cup down, leaning in and placing a delicate kiss on my lips. He pulled away. "Stu called me today," I rolled my eyes as soon as I heard that bastard's name. "And?" I nodded and pulled my eyes away from him, looking down into my cup. "Guess he's gettin' married. Can ye believe that? Stu and Astrid. Wants me to be the best man, he does." John was obviously nervous about how I was going to respond. "That's lovely." I smiled. "Don't be cheeky, Paul." John told me. "M'not! It's lovely, John." I said, trying to seem more sincere than the first time.

"I know of ye feel about him, Paul." John's voice lowered. John kept a tight grip on my hand as I grew more uncomfortable. "I don't want to hold ye back from seein' him, John. I just don't want to feel the way I did in Hamburg, y'know?" I said with a nervous shake in my voice. "Can't ye just put that shite behind us?" John said rather rudely. My defensive walls went up, and I pulled my hand away from him and remained silent. "Don't start, Paul. Christ." John stood up and turned the kettle on. "I'm not startin' shit." I said quietly, looking down at my hands. I began to pick at my nails nervously. "I can tell yer tryin' t'make me feel bad about Hamburg. S'not my fault yer a jealous bastard." John said as he sat back down, lighting a cigarette. "Callin' me a bastard now?" I asked. John took a deep breath. "I'm sorry, m'love. I'm just frustrated and ye know yer not helping." John said, sounding much calmer. "Why in the hell are you frustrated, John? Because you get to attend your best friends wedding?" I took one of his cigarettes as I spoke. 

"No Paul, because I know if I go to Hamburg for the wedding, my fiancé will lose his damn mind and think I'm screwin' a different bloke!" John raised his voice again. "It's not even that, John. Look, I don't want to do this anymore. I'm done with the arguin'. You're your own man, I can't make your decisions and tell you what you can and cannot do." I shook my head and looked back down to my hands. "I don't know why you're being so difficult. I know you're just sayin' that now to get out of an argument. Fucking hell, who would've thought we'd end up here? The first person I fall in love with is a bloody bloke. That relationship ends up being the most serious fuckin' relationship in the world, because-" John stood up and stopped talking half way through his rant. "Because what?!" I asked, standing up in front of him as he began pacing in my kitchen. John threw his cigarette into the ashtray hard, and grabbed my collar. My eyes widened and I held my breath. "Because I'm so head over fuckin' heels in love with you, Paul. Because nothin' else in the bloody world matters because I have you. Because I have nothin' else to bloody live for than you. It's you, Paul. It's always going to be you." John loosened his grip and slowly moved his hands up on to my cheeks. 

The feeling of fear had quickly changed to relief. "I-I," I tried to apologize. "You don't have to say anything. I promise I'm not going to do anything to hurt you, whatever you want Paul, I'd swim across the bloody ocean to get it for you." John's words made my heart melt. He leaned in and kissed me softly and gently. I felt him smile against my lips. He pulled away, but thankfully not to far. I felt John's nose on the tip of mine. "I'll never get over the fact that you, Paul McCartney, are with me." John smiled. "And I am sorry, I shouldn't have gotten so defensive." John added. "Me too." I nodded in agreement and collapsed into hug, burying my head in his shoulder and wrapping my arms around his waist. "I love you." I said quietly into the crook of his neck. "Everything is okay?" John asked, placing a few kisses on the top of my head. 

"As long as you never let go of me." I smiled to myself and curled my fingers into his t-shirt tightly. "Never ever, m'love!"