a Middle Earth therapy session

Majestic King

"The majestic hero majestically sifted through old notes, flurry hair swishing back sensuously." 

"You're kidding?"

"What the-"

"Sensuously, eh?"

Gimli received a whack for his last comment. 

The room lay bathed in silence and incredulity. The question plaguing everyone's minds being 'what was in those tarts?', as Aragorn's story was seeming even more ridiculous than before. Had the man tampered with it during their break? Who knew...

"The notes creaked under his soft but rough hands and he smiled beautifully as he expertly found what he had been searching for. The notes read 'aye, Aragon is fabulous. but what is it we don't know? what is said king hiding under his undergarments?' The majestic King laughed fabulously, but it was still a nice laugh."

Gimli looked ready to burst. 

"The beautiful man read on 'we want to discover this secret and more! so join in and support our good cause by gathering around the seventh floor for a team meeting this very afternoon!' The notes ended in a number of fresh signatures, all uglier than the majestic King's signature."

"How's that a good cause Aragorn?" Alcop wondered. 

Aragorn mildly shrugged, licking his lips in an odd manner, sucking and biting. It looked truly painful. 

Legolas scoffed and answered for him, "I believe our friend feels the need to bury his insecurities under a mass of stupidity." 

"Makes sense." Gimli hummed his approval. "But Aragorn has the ugliest signature!" he yelled suddenly, almost felling the therapist for the seventy seventh time that day... or couple of days? How long had they been in the office? Night was approaching, that much was certain, and the last of their sanity dissipating as Aragorn shared more of his story with them. 

"Agreed."

"It's like an Oliphant sits on his arm whilst he writes it."

"Also agreed."

Aragorn only shook his head at his friends' exchange. 

He continued. "As afternoon approached the city and the light brought out the majestic beauty's flawless skin tone, the King made a very brave decision."

"He died?"

Aragorn ignored Gimli's rude interjection. 

"Say, Aragorn?" Legolas began in a slow tone, chewing his lip thoughtfully, "Have you used a single pronoun for yourself yet? Or is it just majestic King, fabulous man and beauty?"

"Just those."

"Ah."

Gimli's other boot/shoe thing joined the messy, frantic pile on the floor.