Remember Then

X. Promises

Nicholas was thoughtful as he dressed himself while Sophia disappeared behind her dressing screen.

Buttoning his shirt, he studied her silhouette with a slight frown.

He was certain that she was not a virgin when he took her, but her reaction had surprised him.

"Why did you freeze?" he heard himself ask without thinking. He silently cursed himself for it.

To his surprise, she did not react to his question in a violent manner. "Whatever do you mean, my lord?" she softly asked, her silhouette freezing in the act of dressing.

"Earlier, you froze."

A short silence followed and Nicholas thought that perhaps it was at that point where she would fold her dressing screen and haul it across the room with intent to murder.

But she did not do that either. "I was... I never enjoyed sexual encounters before."

She said it so casually that Nicholas' jaw dropped as he gaped at her silhouette with surprise. "Even with Durley?" he could not help but ask.

She chuckled but instead of answering she uttered, "As I have said, my lord, I reserve the right not to talk about other men or how I interact or serve them."

His jaw tightened. He stood up and approached the dressing screen and discovered that she was buttoning her dress with ease. "Sophie, have you been abused?"

This time he saw the anger flash across her features before she shrugged. "It is not of your concern, my lord."

"Did it happen in the brothel—"

"The brothels have many secrets. Not one of them is worthy of recollection," she snapped, stiffly turning to walk back to the chaise. "I would appreciate it if you do not resort to talking about the past. Yours may be marvelous, mine is highly unmentionable."

If her past lovers treated with naught but roughness to a point that she had developed an innate defensive reaction during the act, then why did she allow him to make love to her tonight?

Was it because she wanted to? Or was it because it had become easier for her?

"Then do answer one question for me," he said, walking over to the winged chair.

"So long as it is not about other men, what is your question?"

"How much can you truly see?"

She smiled. "You are curious, are you not?"

"Very."

She shrugged, absently playing with her long curly hair. "I merely see light and shadows. I cannot see anything with a mere small amount of light. It has to be very bright."

Ah, so that explained why she did not discover his cheating when he turned on the bedside lamp. His eyes narrowed at her as she gazed at him as though she could truly see him. "What do you see when you look at my face?"

Her white teeth glowed in contrast to her skin as when she smiled. It was the first she saw her smile that way and his breath was trapped in his lungs. "Shadows," she uttered with a chuckle.

Nicholas scoffed, shaking his head. "A pity then for I promise you, darling, I am beautiful."

She laughed and it was impeccably sweet that Nicholas had the urge to come up with a rather witty remark to hear it again.

"And I suppose that you have never seen your face either?"

She shook her head. "No."

"Then you are even more so unlucky, Sophie, because you are beautiful."