If Only She Knew

Keysha - 10

As the days went by I thought about Bri more and more, still in shock about the whole ordeal. Sometimes I thought about picking up the phone and calling or texting her but somehow my pride wouldn't let me. I learned a long time ago sometimes people have to see things for themselves, so maybe it was best if I stayed out of the way. It was time for me to pick up Jr, so I called Rob.

"Hey, is Jr. ready to go."

"Yea he's asleep right now."

"Did you give him a bath?"

"Yea, thought you would be tired so I went ahead and bathed him and got him ready for bed."

"Thanks, I'll be over in about 10."

"Cool, I got something I wanna holla at you about."

"What's up, did Jr do something?'

"No, he's good. I'll tell you when you get here."

"Cool." Click.

What in the hell did this man want to talk to me about? Maybe he's got his mind right and actually wants to work on our family. I smiled in the thought of us working things out. I honestly cared about Rob. Our situation just made it hard to express them at times. I met Rob through Bri being with Brandon. From day one we always said we would go at it with no strings attached. I fell for dude and he knew it. The harder I fell the more he started to fall back, and before we came crashing down Jr. came into the picture. Jr's existence put strain on both ends. It only made me want him more. I forced myself to put up with his shit, just to feel like what we had was working. After a while reality started to set in. I didn't want a child with a man that didn't love me, didn't want to be with me. I wanted a husband, a family, the house with the picket fence. Wishful thinkful. And on the other hand he didn't want a kid at all. He completely cut off all ties to me and told me and other's it wasn't his child. Why would I name my child after a man that denied him. I knew when and what I was doing. There was no doubt in my mind that Rob was the father. Eventually on down the line he agreed to the DNA test. 99.9% of course ! I was still hurt, how could a man deny his own flesh and blood. How could he allow me to take care of a child we made, alone. Times got hard but I never folded, I made shit happen for my little one. Bri also pitched in here and there when she could. When he actually wanted to be in his life after all this time. I couldn't make myself let the hurt go. So I kept Jr away from him longer. He called day in and day out. I wanted him to suffer like I did. After a while it took so much of my energy trying to keep him away that I grew tired of it and finally gave in. And of course Bri, Mrs. Do Everything Right, talked me into letting Rob spend time with him. I was glad that we both came to common grounds when it came to Jr. Co-parenting makes life so much easier. We've been good ever since.

I pulled up at the house. He met at the door, must've seen the head lights in the window.

"Hey, what's up."

"Nothing much Jr's upstairs asleep, he can really stay if that's fine with you no need in waking him."

"That's fine, can you drop him off in the morning?"

"Yea, that's cool. But look tho, whassup with you and Bri?" he asked.

"Well Brandon basically told her to stop fucking with me, and she did...." I said, not knowing that it still was kind of a sensitive topic for me, until it came out of my mouth. "What made you ask tho," I continued.

"He came over today, kinda bragging about it like he was the man and he had done some big shit."

"That's some bitch shit I swear. But yea she was talking like it would be best for their marriage if I just basically stayed out of their way. I still can't believe she let that nigga make her make moves like that. Me and her been through so much shit together! I was there way before this nigga even came in the picture! It was my shoulder she cried on when this nigga was acting up. Now all of a sudden I'm 'damaging' their marriage that's bullshit! He just don't want her around anybody that'll talk some sense in her fucking head. He ain't no fucking good!" I said almost in tears now.

"You okay?"

"Yea. I'm good." I replied, fighting to hold back the tears.

"Is she pregnant?"

I looked up in disbelief, "What?!"

"I'm asking, is she pregnant?"

"I mean not that I know of. Why you ask?" I asked damn near on the edge of my seat, curious and anxious as fuck!

"He keep bringing up shit bout a baby. Like the other morning when I called you I was tryna tell you how he snapped out at the crib. I was too drunk to even think straight. But I had a party, lit kick back type shit with a couple bitches over."

I rolled my eyes to the top of my head. Well it won't be no getting together with none of that shit going on. I continued  listening.

He continued, "And he ducked off to himself, he had been kinda buggin the whole night. I could tell something was off with him. I heard hollering, when I got to the room he had a tight grip on one of the female's arm and I swear I think he said some shit about a baby. At first I ain't think nothing of it, because we were all fucked up that night but then he came over here asking me shit about being a daddy and how it felt, just some weird shit! Something got to be up. I thought maybe Bri was expecting, but I'm pretty sure you would've been the first person to know about it."

"Wow. That's crazy, but I mean the mind control he got over her ain't no telling when I'll ever hear from her again. If they are expecting I'm happy for them I guess," I said humping my shoulders.

"Just seemed strange to me. You still fuck with that Shanti girl?"

"Yea. Here and there why what's up,"

"Shid she picked him up from my house today."

"What the fuck?" I said confused. How the fuck did they know each other? Then that shit hit me like a sack of bricks. "She pregnant!!! And she said it was by a married man!" I yelled out without thinking. I instantly got goosebumps, sitting there in a daze with my mouth wide open at the thought of what I had just found out.

"Maaaaaa," Jr called out, must've awakened from my outburst.