Little Wonder (Phan)

Sixty-Five.

"Where are you going, Papa?" I'd been having trouble breathing lately, and I didn't want to worry her anymore than she'd been worrying the past few months. Yes, I'd stayed a few more months, though I don't know where I would've gone anywhere. Phil hadn't really been there, I had just been missing him, I'd even stopped going to his grave. He was gone, I should really just get past him. Smiling at her I told her I'd just be out for a few minutes, but I knew I'd be out for a lot longer than that, but she'd be just fine without me. I was basically not around as much anymore, these past few months, and she'd seemed just fine. Other than being a little bit jealous that I wasn't spending as much time with her anymore. Running out of the flat, I knew that something was really wrong, I couldn't breath anymore, and the voices were louder now.

Holding my head, my other hand on my stomach, I stumbled down the street. No one even stopped to see what was wrong. What was wrong with them? What was wrong with me? With another deep gasp, another hopeful gasp for air, I found myself back at his grave. A place I'd been avoiding for a while, even though he couldn't speak, maybe he could tell me what was wrong with me. Placing my hand on top of the cool stone I looked at it with tears in my eyes, I wanted answers. "For fuck's sake, don't go silent on me now. Phil I need you, I need you more than I've ever needed you before. I'm scared, and I feel so alone. Something is wrong with our little girl, she's acting so weird. Can you see it up there?" I knew he'd at least made it up there, he was to good and pure in this world to go to Hell, unlike me. I was going to Hell if I knew anything in this entire world. But then I realised, I didn't know anything about this world any more, something was off about the entire world. And then I heard his voice, but he wasn't talking quietly anymore, he was screaming and shouting, and sounded like he was restrained.

'LET ME GO! PLEASE HE CAN'T DIE, I DON'T KNOW HOW TO LIVE WITHOUT HIM!' I was trying to get to him, he was right in front of me, and I heard a hand in mine, tears were pricking my own eyes as I tried to reach him. But I could never get there. "Papa?" And there she was again, Winnie. She was standing right in front of me, but her lips weren't moving again, but she was shouting down at me. "ARE YOU GOING TO LEAVE ME!?" Covering my ears I tried to run away from her, something was really wrong. I knew something had been off the entire time, but now it was confirmed. Running as far and as fast as I could, I knew that I wouldn't be able to get that far. I was running out of air. 'NO STOP! HE WON'T BE ABLE TO BREATH! PLEASE JUST GIVE ME ANOTHER WEEK I'M BEGGING YOU!' Phil's screams were in my head, and Winnie was shouting angrily at me, but I also heard her screaming for me to not leave them. 'PAPA! PAPA THEY'RE GONNA TAKE ME AWAY! PAPA DON'T LET THEM TAKE ME AWAY FROM YOU AND DADDY!' Take away? I stopped running, who was going to take her away from us? Suddenly she was right in front of me, but I knew she wasn't.

"You're a demon." It was hitting me, an inner demon. Manifesting as the figure of my daughter to get me to do exactly as it wanted. This time she didn't look upset, she was actually smiling, suddenly morphing into me. Claiming that I had no way out of here, I was going to die and then they would be all alone. Winnie would be taken away, and Phil would die alone, he wouldn't be able to love ever again. "Fuck you." Running forward, I ran right through them and was surprised by how fast they'd vanished. But they were right back in front of me. Saying I couldn't get out of here, but I knew that I could. There was a bright light at the end of it all, but I had a feeling that would just end it all, I would -- flatline? Die. I would die. 'DAN PLEASE WAKE UP I'M BEGGING YOU!' "I'm coming, Phil." I whispered, this was like a cliche fanfiction, but I didn't really care right now. All that mattered was getting back to Phil and Winnie. They were not going to take me away from them. The demons were not going to win this battle. They'd won thousands of battles over the years, but I was going to win this one.

"I'M COMING!" I shouted, but then stopped. The light, the light was bad, was there another option? Looking all around I could see them, and it broke my heart. Winnie was crying as a man was trying to comfort her, and Phil was fighting. He was trying to swing at people who looked like doctor's. But then it hit me, Phil wasn't dead. Was I dead? And then I saw myself, I was lying in a hospital bed, and I looked asleep, but I was having trouble breathing. Like right now. Clutching where I saw wounds, my abdomen, I had a feeling of what had actually gone down two years ago. Was it even two years ago? Winnie didn't look as old as she did right now. Or who I thought had been Winnie. "I'm coming, I swear." I turned away from the light, but I heard voices, voices that urged me closer and closer until I'd fallen in. I looked up, all around, and then with fear realised I'd done the opposite of what I'd been trying to do. Looking down I saw that Phil had calmed down, Winnie had stopped crying. I had flatlined. 'Dan?' I could hear the sadness in his voice, and Winnie stepped up next to me, shaking me gently. 'Papa?'