Melting the Ice

22; chimerical

"chimerical"

— 

(adjective) As one of the synonyms for the imaginary, chimerical surpasses the realm of fantasy. To describe a person, place or thing as chimerical is to indulge in one's fantasies. Chimerical is defined as highly unreal, imaginary and wildly visionary in the most pleasurable sense; it is one the most bittersweet words in the English lexicon. A chimerical production is the cause of a lush imagination; this paradigm is an extremely personal utopia, whether it is an idea of love, peace or an environment.  

    ❄️❄️❄️❄️    

The anticipated Saturday finally comes. Miles agreed to come, too, and he even drives us. He was a bit hesitant at first, seeing that he's still a bit reserved about Zach. He also didn't like that Zach made me cry that night, although it wasn't really all Zach's fault and, truthfully, I've cried because of Miles before, too. I didn't tell him that, though. I didn't want him to feel bad. 

And I am, indeed, wearing Zach's jersey. Well, it's mine now. With his name on it. Miles looked at me weirdly when he saw me wearing it. "Where did you get that?" he asked me, looking closely at the shirt.

I looked at it, too. "Zach gave it to me," I stated proudly, twirling around.

Miles put his hands on his sides and stared at me with a studying expression. "Huh," he said. "Is it serious between you two?"

I looked at him in question. "He ... just gave me his jersey, I'm pretty sure it's not that deep ..." I cocked my head to the side, raising my eyebrows slightly. 

Miles nodded, unsure of my words. "Sure. Let's go now." 

And that was it for that jersey. I'm kind of glad he didn't say anything that would cause me to be mad at him again. I've already figured he doesn't like Zach but I think he's trying to tolerate him - for me, at least. 

Zach gave us good seats, all the way down, being really near the ice. He made sure we're going to see everything perfectly clear. And it just warms my heart a little more. 

I look around myself, the anticipation everywhere around us, people waiting for the game to begin, all cheering for the two different teams here tonight. It's amazing, seeing everyone so excited, waiting for the teams to take the ice and own it. 

And Zach was right, there's not one woman wearing the same jersey as me. Because this is unique - only one out there and it's right on me. But I've seen a few women looking at me a little longer than it's normal and wearing mean expressions. The jealousy wasn't well hidden and it filled me with uneasiness. 

Once the game started, though, my eyes were nowhere but on the ice. No, not on the ice - on that particular man that I just can't stop thinking about. He's ... amazing. Of course I knew that from before and I knew he's going to kill it tonight. 

I'm screaming his name, laughing out loud and rooting for him. Miles isn't as excited as me, though, but I see he casts a smile here and there just watching me. It's a good feeling, finally feeling free and just escaping the real world for awhile. Zach helped me with that most of the time.  

I'm going through mixed emotions, watching Zach on the ice, being amazing as always. I've never seen him play this serious, though. I've watched him with the team, but this is completely different. The atmosphere is different. I love it.

I also imagine myself going on every Zach's game as his ... girlfriend. Supporting him, being proud of him. 

It hits me suddenly how much I want it and how real it is. I've wanted this for a long time, but I've just been too scared of my own feelings, fighting them, but in the middle of all that, I started to have feelings for him.