Dark Passions

Chapter Twenty-Two

I stared at the lady in disbelief. No...No way. I felt the lump in my throat expand, and for a moment I didn't think I was going to be able to breathe. The lady's expression sunk, and she looked around, hoping to find something to say. I lowered my eyes to the floor, feeling lost.

"May I see him?" I finally asked, mustering up the courage to talk. Her eyes widened when I asked.

"They may have already moved him but...I can go look for you." I waited as the lady got up and went into the back room. I didn't know what to think. My Grandpa was gone. Even though he couldn't remember me and he called me different names, he was family. He was one of the only blood relatives I had left. Anger coursed through me as I thought of my father. Why would he do such a thing?! My father had no business, no right to do what he did. He wasn't even around! He didn't care about my Grandpa. I gritted my teeth together as I tried to think about why he would be so cold-hearted. I would love to ask him why, but I knew I would get no response from him. I haven't heard from him since he left me when I was seven. I doubt he would talk to me now. I heard footsteps and I glanced upwards at her.

"They have him already prepped and ready to go...if you want to go to his viewing, it'll be on Wednesday at 3:00 p.m."

"No, that's alright," I whispered as I looked down at the floor. I don't want to see my Grandpa when people have messed with him. I wanted to see what he looked like...what I left him like. The lady mumbled an apology as I turned and left. I solemnly walked down the sidewalk, not bothering to look where I was going. My plan to sit with my Grandpa turned out to be a fiasco, and I hated knowing I was going to be returning to Black sooner than expected. No doubt he would have something smart to say, but even I didn't have the strength to argue with him. I knew I still had a few hours to spare, so I went to the next place my mind could think of. I turned down the street and continued walking until the cemetery came into view.

I walked up to the gates and pushed them open, creaking as they went. I walked over to the sign and studied it until I found the names I wanted to visit. I walked over to my Grandma's grave, and stood in front of it. I stared down at her grave, feeling my throat tightening up again. Only a month after I moved in did you die...am I bad luck to people, Grandma? I slid my eyes over to the right to see wildflowers growing off in a patch. A light smile touched my lips as I walked over and picked a few. I laid them at the base of her grave.

"Grandpa will be joining you soon," I whispered to her headstone as I arranged the flowers. "Give him a hug for me, will you? And tell him...tell him I am so sorry for leaving him." I felt the tears gather in my eyes and I quickly blinked them back. I observed her grave a moment longer before heading to my next destination. I walked down the silent rows of graves, my feet getting heavier with each step. I wasn't here for her funeral. I stopped in front of the newest headstone, its polished marble shining in the sunlight. The words "Ally Hamilton" were engraved in the center, with an elegant edge to them. I sat down in front of the grave, and stared at it. Everything was being ripped out of my life. First with my parents, then my grandparents, and now Ally.

"How much more sorrow is life going to hand me, Ally?" I said softly, a light breeze ruffling through my hair. "I should've never let you go off alone. I should've been more wary about a vacation like that. But I couldn't say no to you. You're the only person I couldn't say no to." I paused as I ran a hand over the smooth top of the headstone. "The one time I wasn't there for you..." I trailed off as the tears rushed back, and this time I couldn't force them back. Silver streams ran down my cheeks, and I closed my eyes as pain stabbed at my heart. This whole thing with you and Mr. Black; it's all my fault. Ally's voice rang through my head, and I clenched my hands into fists.

"It's not your fault, Ally," I muttered as I looked at her grave through teary eyes. "He had everything planned out—" Jess, you don't understand! This whole thing was a setup for one reason! My eyes widened as I blinked, staring at the headstone. Was it a coincidence Ally came across those tickets? I stared absentmindedly at Ally's headstone, like she herself were talking to me. Why was I thinking about this only now? I knew the answer the second I asked the question. Black never gave me a chance to get my thoughts in order. Even in New Zealand, all I thought about was getting my degree so I could challenge him. Jess, you don't know who he is, do you? I closed my eyes as Ally's desperate voice rang through my head. I wouldn't listen to Ally then. I was so intent on escaping, so ready to get away, that I ignored Ally's words of warning. More importantly Jess, he knows you. And not just what you think, or what he has already told you. Jess, I fear for you. I slowly got to my feet, my head starting to clear. Ally was going to tell me something, before Black interrupted her. What was Ally going to say? I looked over my shoulder at her tombstone, and my eyes lowered in downcast.