Awake

Chapter 9

I don't remember leaving the house or the drive to the hospital. The entire drive there, I was on auto-pilot, before rushing through the doors of the emergency room. It felt like things were going in slow motion, and my head was underwater. Everything was muffled and moving too slowly; why weren't they moving quicker? Why can't they hurry up and take me to my mom?

Dad was already in the waiting room, and pulled me into a tight embrace as soon as I reached him. I shoved him away, choosing to track down a nurse or a doctor that could tell me what was happening with my mom. Where is she? What's happened? Is she okay? I was always met with the same answer. "I'm sorry, miss. The doctor is in the room and hasn't spoken to any of us yet, as soon as we hear anything, you'll be the first to know."

I paced through the waiting room for at least an hour, willing myself to stay strong. I can't break down here.. Not in front of the staff, the other patients, and never, ever in front of my father. He already views me as weak and pathetic, this would just give him some sort of comedic relief. I heard someone's phone ringing in the waiting room, ringing and ringing constantly. I couldn't take it anymore. "Would somebody answer the fucking phone, please?" I shrieked, hugging my arms to myself, pacing all the while. Dad tapped me twice on the shoulder, startling me.

"It's for you," he muttered quietly, allowing me to snatch the phone from his hands.

"Yeah," I snapped. I wasn't even sure who was on the phone, I just knew I didn't want to be on a call for more than thirty seconds tops.

"Cam, where are you? The door at the house was open, lights on, and all of your things are here minus your keys and phone," Nathan rambled, panic in his voice.

"I can't talk right now, Nathan," I sighed, hanging up the phone. The only way I could snap out of this funk was to be told Mom is okay, and that she's allowed to come home with me now. My phone started ringing in my hands again, and in one swift moment, I threw it on the ground, shattering the screen.

"Camille, that is enough," Dad growled, standing up. "It's one thing to lash out at me, but there's no reason to treat that boy or your phone the way you just did."

"His name is Nathan, Dad," I huffed. "You wouldn't even know the first thing about us anyway, you're never around and you've never made an effort to get to know him, despite him being polite to you every damn time!"

The only sound in the waiting room now was the sound of my heavy breathing, and the distant sirens from an incoming ambulance. Dad's face turned completely tomato red, his eyes on fire. Silently, he motioned for us to step outside. Rolling my eyes, I stomped out the door after him. I already knew I was in for a lecture, though he was the last person on the planet that should be lecturing me. "I'm going to make this quick, Camille, and then we're going to go inside and wait, acting like civilized human beings. Do you understand?" Glaring past him, I nodded, waiting for him to continue. "I know I've messed up colossally with Nathan, and especially with you and your siblings, and I don't expect you to forgive me for that. I want to make up for it, and I want to get to know him, if that's okay with you."

"Forget it. Focus on making things right with Mom, then we can talk. Until then, don't even bother," I bumped my shoulder against his purposely, walking back to the waiting room. Time stopped as I saw a team of doctors rushing a patient from the ER, over to the elevator. As they passed by, I saw a glimpse of my mom, unconscious, on the table. I wasn't able to hear what the nurses or doctors were saying, but my feet carried me over to the elevator, doors closing before I made it. As I collapsed to the ground, I felt strong arms holding me there; the only thing I was able to hear was my own wailing.

The receptionist came over to me and knelt down, trying to make eye contact with me. I wasn't able to stop shaking or crying, and soon, I was lifted and being carried through the ER doors. Nathan cradled my head as he lay me down on the hospital bed, before being pushed back by nurses. "Miss? Are you with me?" I nodded, trying to catch my breath. No matter how deeply I tried to breathe, there wasn't enough air in the room to fill my lungs, which felt like they were collapsing. "Breathe deeply, count to five.."