speak | taehyung

twenty four: damn you kim taehyung

Jimin and I were sitting on opposite ends of his shabby old couch, our eyes directed to the crappy movie we rented for a buck. Separating us was bowl of popcorn which remained untouched and a carton of melted chocolate ice cream.

Jimin remained fairly distant these days. The silence between us and the minimal conversation was uncomfortable and lonely. I suspected that Jimin was seeing someone else but I kept quiet. My relationship with him had no official label, so there was no excuse for me to feel jealous or possessive. But in the slightest way, it broke my heart to know that he was with another girl. I always assumed that we had a mutual understanding. After all, he kissed me first.

"Hey. You okay?" I looked to Jimin as he checked his phone for the millionth time.

"Uh...yeah," He replied with a faint grin which was not at all reassuring.

"Okay," I whispered.

His eyes lingered on my face, but my focus remained on the television. I tensed as I felt movement and turned to see him remove the blockade of popcorn and ice cream between us, but my expression softened when he touched my cheek. Gently, he traced my jaw and his fingers went through my hair. He was beautiful and despite the fact that I knew he had someone else, I felt beautiful when I was with him.

Then slowly, as if he had been reading my desperate mind, we kissed. For the longest time his soft lips touched mine, a whispered sorry escaping every time he let go. Everything about it was sad and blissful at once.

"Jimin. I almost fell for you."

"I liked you a lot and I almost fell for you too. But I know you love Taehyung. It's time I fulfill my own happiness. I hope you forget him because he's jerk."

"Damn you, Kim Taehyung."

"Damn you. Kim Taehyung."

I never understood why I cried so hard after I left. Was it because I was beginning to develop feelings for him? Or was it because I knew that another person had left me?

Jimin and I were unofficially together and we had our unofficial breakup that night.

In another lifetime, I wish to love him. Park Jimin.

Because Kim Taehyung, he deserves my love so much more than you do.

Damn you.