irrevocable // [e.v.]

01; release me

There I lie, entwined in the warmth of sheets. My slumber was disrupted, and as I slowly began to part my eyes, the crisp morning sunshine blinded me.
A figure stood before me and instantaneously I realized that my reveries were cleared away. There was the monster of a man who I had once fell in love with.

His growl of a voice startled me conscious. “It’s about time you woke up.”

I balled my hands into tiny fists and I looked down at my legs. Glancing over at the alarm clock, it read 10:37 AM.

“Alec, it’s still early.” A low groan escaped his lips and I peered at him in fright.

“You know I don’t like it when you talk back to me, girl.”

Instead of giving him the reaction he begged for, I gathered myself. Springing out of bed and quickly sprinting to the bathroom, I shut the door behind me and locked it.

My once quickening heartbeat slowed to its normal pace.

I prepared myself to take a glance at my appearance in the mirror. My fingertips traced the rough, purple contusion which reposed on my cheek. Letting out a hiss in discomfort, I removed my hand at an instant.

After a long shower, I made my way to the bedroom Alec and I shared together.

I discovered that the TV had been turned on and my eyes spotted Alec, lounged in the recliner with a beer in his grip.

Tightly, I clenched my hold on the towel, shuffling through my dresser drawers in search of clean underwear and a bra. I could hear the recliner click as Alec set his beer down on the table. His feet shuffled behind me and I shut my eyes in fear. His breath fanned my neck and his arms snaked their way around my waist. He forcefully removed my hands from the towel, and as it fell to the floor I gasped.

His large hands cupped my breasts aggressively and soon I could feel his erection poking into my back.

“Alec,” I started. “Not right now. I just showered. Maybe later, okay?” He put up a fight.

“I want some now.” He breathed.
He reeked of alcohol and cigarette smoke.

In protest, I freed myself out of his hold on me. Picking up the towel and placing it back on my body, I attempted to push past him. His hand reached around to grab my wrist, pulling me back to him. My eyes scanned his face and nostalgia hit me as I remembered him with a bright smile and welcoming arms.

“You bitch! What have I told you about disrespecting me?!” He let go of me, allowing his hand to make its way across my face in a harsh slap.

Tears pricked my eyes and I fell to the floor, sobbing.

“I’m sick of your shit Delia, I’m out of here for good.”

Alec stumbled to the closet, reaching for his suitcase and drunkenly throwing his clothes in along with the rest of his personal items. My screams filled the room and he stood, taking one disgusted glance at me before walking out of the door and out of my life.

Alec's feet could be heard shuffling down the stairs, and I heard him mumbling his last words before walking out.

“Have a nice life.”

The door slammed shut and the frames on the wall shuddered.

Silence consumed the house and numbness consumed me. Rising from the floor, my trembling hands reached for my clothing and I slid them on. My quaking knees made their way to the safest place I knew. My bed.

I stared at the ceiling for a while before shutting off the television and closing my lids.

The dreams filled my brain again.

✴