Animal

Chapter 50

How many nights would you wish someone would stay? Lie awake only hoping they're okay.

*LOUIS' POV*

Olivia turns six months tomorrow and considering there won't be a party of any kind, I have to try my best to make the tiny celebration as special as possible. This is why I've shown up at the local supermarket to buy the best birthday cake they have. Bean has been such a wonderful baby even with everything I put her through, and she deserves it.

I put her in the baby seat of the trolley I would push around with me, arming her chubby little arms with my shopping list that's compiled by Niall.

The hardest thing I had to witness was Niall leaving Zayn behind and the most gut-wrenching thing I was a part of, was leaving myself. It felt like the biggest chunk of my soul has been left behind in a tight plastic bag that would suffocate the hope it contained until nothing but pain was left behind.

I recall begging Niall to not sacrifice what he had with Zayn for me but my best friend gripped my arm and hauled me out the door with him anyway. He later told me that Zayn was falling out of love with him, and he wasn't sticking around for a slow sizzle end.

Everyday was harder than the previous one, and better than what's to come. At least that's what I told myself.

"Chocolate or vanilla, sweet pea?" I ask Olivia when we come to the bakery section, whispering it in her ear as she tossed my list around.

She didn't answer with words, instead made a very joyful noise at the appearance of chocolate icing and patted my hand the way she did when she wanted something. Her first go at solid food would be tomorrow and I'm determined to make it a good day despite the gaping hole I carried around with me.

"Chocolate, I know." I lift her out of the cart when I notice her cheeks reddening with distress. "Oh sweetheart. What's wrong, baby girl?"

Bean holds onto me while the lady behind the counter places the chosen cake into my cart. I pull her aside with the trolley and rock her against my shoulder until she softens. The neckline of my shirt shifts to accommodate her baby ear pressing to where my heartbeat can be heard.

"Oh love." I kiss her forehead and arm. "Better?"

She babbles nonsense and closes her eyes. I hate moments like these because although I love to comfort my daughter, it reminds me that I'm alone in that duty now. I didn't mind because I'd go to the ends of the world for baby Livvy, but it'd be nice to have a companion in the quest sometimes.

Olivia babbles some baby talk and shows signs of sleepiness. I kiss her soft forehead and put her back in the cushioned seat I'd strapped onto the trolley.

"Such a wonderful baby." A stranger approaches me, an elder one with a kind smile and wrinkled eyes. Middleston residents loved babies, as a stereotype.

"Thank you." I offer a polite smile but shield Liv as much as I can.

"What's this angel's name?" She asks, beaming down at my daughter while Olivia yawns with her father's pouted lips. I tighten my hand in my hoodie pocket in a desperate scramble for my cool.

"Olivia." I rub her little foot that's covered by the fabric of her onesie. "Olivia Jane."

"Beautiful name." She compliments before turning her attention to me. "You know, people seem to recognise you."

"What do you mean?" I have the unbreakable urge to walk away before this conversation ripens into something unfortunate.

"You're Louis from the fourth street, yes?" She gracefully moves away when I retake the handle of my trolley.